Flashback again, to Casa Porter. Mercutio finds Walt playing with Vincent by the pool on the magnificent patio. "Hey, Walt," he says. Walt looks up. "Who are you?" he says. It takes Mercutio a long while to introduce himself as Walt's father. Walt looks really confused. Mercutio forges ahead, expressing his sympathy for Walt's losing his mother. "You should know that we loved each other very much when we had you," says Mercutio, although I can't say we saw a lot of evidence that Susan loved Mercutio. Mercutio explains that he's come to take Walt home with him. "I'm not going anywhere with you," says Walt, which means at least he's been brought up right. Swallowing his pride, Mercutio lies and says Bryan loves Walt very much and wants him to stay, but it's not up to Bryan; Mercutio is Walt's legal guardian, he says. "It's not like he's going to disappear from your life. He'll still call you, write you, come to see you whenever he can." (I'm not quite sure that it's a good idea to lie to Walt about that, however.) And hey, says Mercutio, you'll still be able to have your dog. But this is Bryan's dog, says Walt. Mercutio barely misses a beat: "Bryan said you could have him," he says, doing his best not to smile. Heh.

Amazingly, the Coca-Cola polar bear has not actually eaten Walt yet. Walt's still yelling for his dad, and finally Walt hears his dad yell back. And where is dear ol' Dad? Well, he's with Locke, carefully walking along a tree that's helpfully collapsed so that people can rescue their wayward children. Isn't that lucky! Locke and Mercutio walk right over top of the Coca-Cola polar bear into the top of the magical grove of shelter. And oh, sure, now that Walt's being attacked by a polar bear, it's okay for him to use a knife! Mercutio gets Locke to toss him one of the big ones, and then he drops it down to Walt, telling him to use it if the polar bear gets near (thanks for the tip, Dad). Locke also tosses Mercutio a rope, and he climbs down, while Walt actually stabs the polar bear in the paw. Yeah, I'm buying this. While the bear's gone, presumably to put a little mercurochrome on that cut, Mercutio ties the rope around Walt, so Locke can haul him up. "What about you?" yells Walt, and Mercutio tells him not to worry about it. Locke hauls Walt up, but the polar bear's back, and there's gonna be trouble. Or so we're supposed to believe. Commercials.

So this turns out to be not such a big deal either, because Mercutio jabs at the polar bear and manages to get it, and it roars a bit and stomps off, probably to go tobogganing. Mercutio climbs the tree up to the top, where he and Walt hug, and Walt apologizes. Mercutio says everyone's okay, so he's just glad Walt's safe. Puss. My dad would still have torn a strip off me: "You see? This is why you listen to me! So we don't get eaten by polar bears!" (Note: I grew up in the Yukon and Northwest Territories, so this is actually true.) Walt says Vincent ran away, and Locke tells him not to worry, because Vincent's already found his way back to Walt once. Yeah, but what good is Vincent if he cuts and runs at the first sign of trouble? Walt was this close to being in the polar bear's belly, and Vincent is off somewhere licking himself? No thanks, Vincent. You suck. And Locke and Mercutio look at each other and give each other a Tight-Lipped Smile and Manly Nod of Truce.