Lost

Episode Report Card
Daniel: C | 1 USERS: C
YOU GRADE IT
Leaving your mark

He says he was lying: "I would have done anything to get my friends out. And turning you people against each other was my best chance of creating chaos." Juliet should try a little harder to hide her surprised reaction.

The smile's gone from Isabel's face now; she looks pissed. I am actually scared of her (and yet still attracted. It's the damnedest thing). She gets up from her seat and walks around to the front of her desk, glaring at Jack. Even he has the good sense not to lol right now. "Why are you lying for her, Jack?" she practically hisses at him. Tom and Juliet seem just as interested in the answer. "I'd like to go back to my cage now," he says.

Slender legs in big clunky heels skulk into Jack's hut, where he stirs in his bed, covered in mosquito netting. He watches Achara get undressed and crawl into bed with him. "What time is it?" he says, sleepily. "It's late," she says, kissing him. He says she tastes salty, and she says she went for a swim in the ocean. "Washing the day off of you, huh?" he says. Jack, if you really think this stranger in Thailand is a hooker, I hope you've got more protection than mosquito netting. Also, DON'T SLEEP WITH HER. Achara's English is good enough that she understands the implications of what Jack's said. "Is there something you'd like to ask me, Jack?" He says that it would be nice, after a month of her coming and going (um, and coming?) whenever she wants, to find out something about her. She rolls off him and lies on her back. "There are things that happen here that you could never understand," she says. Well, that ought to satisfy his curiosity. Good job, Achara. "Like your gift?" guesses Jack. And she says, "Yes, like my gift." And they start making out, and roll off the bed, laughing. "Are you having fun with me, Jack?" He says he is. She tells him to stop asking questions then, and just have fun. Oh -- now I get what's going on here! Jack is the Lost viewership, and the dirty Thai prostitute is the show itself! Quit asking questions! Just have fun! There are things going on you couldn't possibly understand! And I'm not going to explain! Now shut up and let me screw you!

Jack wakes up in his cage on Alcatraz, and is surprised to see a bunch of people milling about outside, looking at him. "What?" yells Jack. Nobody says anything. And then Cindy -- former stewardess for Oceanic -- steps forward and is all, "Hey, Jack!" He doesn't recognize her at first, like he would ever forget someone who brought him booze. After a moment, though, he recalls her as the stewardess, and Cindy reminds him what her name is. He asks her what she's doing with them; he thought she was captured. "They're not, um... it's not that simple," she says, which means they haven't quite worked things out in the writers' room yet. Jack wants to know what they're doing, and specifically, what Cindy's doing. He's yelling at her by this point. And Cindy seems weirdly surprised by Jack's anger -- like she thought he'd be all happy to see her. "We're here to watch, Jack," she says. "Watch what?" he asks, and she doesn't answer, as Emma -- remember the little girl Emma, from the tail section? -- strolls up and whispers in Cindy's ear, and then stands there smiling. "She wants to know how Ana-Lucia's doing," says Cindy brightly. Jack's all, are you fucking kidding me? And again, Cindy's confused by how pissed he is. This genuine bafflement on the part of the Others over the Lostaways' reaction to their mistreatment better have a good explanation -- oh, who am I kidding. Jack yells, "If you've got something to watch, Cindy, go watch it! Go!" Cindy leaves with Emma, and the other Others shuffle off. And there's Zach, who gives his teddy bear to Emma and then stares at Jack before leaving too. I think one of them yelled back, "Yeah, well, I hear Heroes is pretty good, so whatever, Jack," but I can't be sure.

Over on Alcatraz, Kate wakes up at the campsite, and notices that Carl isn't there. She gets to her feet, and wakes Sawyer up to tell him. But the two of them don't have to search very far before they hear the sound of crying nearby. "I got it," says Sawyer. Kate wants to go talk to him, but Sawyer insists on doing it himself: "Boys only," he says, heading through the brush, generating ideas for yet more disturbing Lost slash fiction.

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Lost

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