The Hunting Party

Episode Report Card
Erin: B- | Grade It Now!
Michael's Got a Gun

"You're exactly right, Jack!" says a raspy voice from off-screen. The boys all turn on a dime and standing in the distance is a hairy bearded dude. They aim their guns. "But if I were you," says the hairy dude, "I'd listen to Mr. Locke." The boys continue aiming their guns as the Deliverance banjos get ready to duel because if someone doesn't squeal like a pig by the end of this episode, I'll eat my own kneecap.

After the commercials, the boys are still aiming their guns at Hairy Man, and Jack asks him who he is. "He's the son of a bitch who shot me on the raft," says Sawyer, moving toward the guy. "Why don't you point the gun down?" suggests Hairy Man. Sawyer ignores him and keeps moving forward and someone outside the clearing fires a shot at him, grazing his ear and drawing blood. "Where's Michael?" asks Jack. "Don't worry about Michael," says Hairy Man. "He's not gonna find us." Jack asks him what he wants and it would seem that Hairy Man is a tad chilly, because all he wants is for Locke to build them a fire. He's also dying for some gossip, apparently, because he wants them all to have a wee little chat. (On an entirely different note, the guy who's playing Hairy Man is someone named M.C. Gainey and, according to his IMDb bio, he frequently plays hillbilly characters up to no good. Guess the quip about the Deliverance banjos wasn't so off the mark, huh?)

Dharma Central. Hurley's no good at being alone, so he's brought along Charlie for the Button Watching Ceremony. They're paging through the stack of LPs, looking for something fun to listen to while they wait until they have to push Button of Doom. Hurley pulls out a "Geronimo Jackson" album and hands it to Charlie, who says, "As an expert on all things musical, I never heard of these guys, shocking as that may be." Uch. I love Dominic Monaghan, but Charlie bugs. "Expert on all things musical"? Is he kidding? Shut up, Drivesmack. Hurley finally finds an album that piques his interest and tells Charlie to put it on the turntable. Then he comes to the real reason he asked Charlie down here: Libby. He thinks he has a shot at Libby, seeing as they're on a desert island and all. Charlie looks over at Hurley and appears to ponder this, but then he just asks if Hurley thinks Claire's missing him yet and Hurley just rolls his eyes and says, "Dude. It's been a day." Heh. So, no then?

Just then, Sayid enters, looking like someone just ran over his puppy. Or shot his girlfriend. Or whatever. "This music is quite depressing," he says, even though no one asked him. No one asked you to come down to the shelter either, dude. Don't like the music? DON'T LISTEN. But Hurley has a soft spot for Sayid and jumps up all, we can change the music to something else! Something that'll lift your spirits! And make you think of something other than dead girls you barely knew but claim to love! Sayid asks where Jack and Locke are and Charlie says they've gone after Michael and Walt along with everyone else and Sayid's like, uh, everyone? Who's everyone? Hurley tells him that it was Jack, Sawyer, Locke, and Kate and you can tell Sayid's thinking, "Okay, that's hardly everyone. And since when am I not included in the 'everyone,' anyway? I am NOT crying. Shut up! I never liked those guys anyway!"

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