Lost

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Cindy McLennan: B+ | Grade It Now!
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You Don't Know Jack
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

We're getting so near the end, I feel like I should have some zippy opener, but... we're getting so near the end, you know? I have three brain cells left. I can't wait for the end of this show that I never want to end. You feel me, yes? All right, then let's skip the Previouslies and get right to it. You ready? Okay.

Islandways; Camp Faucke; Night: We pick up right where we left off in "Everybody Loves Hugo" with everybody just loving Hugo, particularly Faucke, who is delighted that Jacob's right-hand man and mouthpiece has led the Jacobites (and Frank) into his clutches. Faucke addresses Jack directly and asks to speak to him alone. Don't do it, Jack. Don't do it. Watch Jack carefully here, and remember that there are rules to this game. Jack doesn't speak to Faucke, he doesn't even look at him head-on. Instead, he walks up to Hurley and asks his permission to talk to Faucke. Hurley: "It's all you, dude." Rifle in hand, Jack nods at Faucke. "All right, let's catch up." His The last time I saw you, I was putting my dead father's shoes on your equally dead corpse remains unspoken.

Once they're alone, Jack notes that his companion looks just like him, i.e. John Locke. Faucke asks if that bothers him. Jack says what's actually bothering him is that he has no idea what Faucke is. Faucke's all sure you do, and that's that. Jack: "Why John Locke?" A good question, considering all the far more handsome (far less moobalicious) men on this island. If I had to be a boy on that island, I think I'd be Jin. Daniel Dae Kim's bone structure is to die for.

Anyhow, Faucke explains what we've known for ages. Stupid Locke (who stupidly thought that all these stupid people wearing expensive clothes were brought to this stupid island for some stupid reason) stupidly pursued his stupid belief until it got him killed, and Jack was stupid kind enough to bring back the body, "in a nice wooden box." Looks like Faucke is all for the timber. (Buffy fans represent!)

Jack catches on quickly and asks Faucke who else he's "looked like." Faucke tells him to ask what he really wants to ask, so Jack asks if it was Faucke who appeared as his dead father, way back in season 1's "White Rabbit." Faucke confirms this. When Jack wants to know why, Faucke says that Jack needed to find water and that all he's ever been interested in is helping him, and more specifically, helping him to leave. "But because Jacob chose you, you were trapped on this island, before you even got here. Now Jacob's dead. [...] We can get on an airplane and fly away anytime we want to [...]" but, "it has to be all of us."

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Lost

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