Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: A | Grade It Now!
Right Round Like A Record Baby

Meanwhile, in the hotel room, Ben takes a package of sorts out of the air vent. Raise your hand if you thought: He learned that from Lilly! Jack returns to the room, still looking clean and sober in his nice suit, but seems oblivious to Ben and whatever that package is that he's now stashing in his bag. Jack's too busy rifling through his cast-off jeans and jacket to pay attention to anything else. Ben says, "You looking for your pills, Jack? I flushed them down the toilet." Jack bluffs that he's glad and was just going to do the same thing, himself. Ben plays along without smirking, even. "Yeah. I figured you were." Crap, that means I've got to downgrade his evility again. Ben's checking out. He instructs Jack to go home and grab a suitcase. "If there's anything in this life you want, pack it in there, because you're never coming back." Sweating, Jack indicates this is good. Ben echoes his, "Good," then says, "I'll pick you up in six hours." In the meantime, he needs to move John Locke's casket somewhere safe. When Jack questions this -- and asks if Locke isn't dead, Ben gives him a non-answer. "I'll see you in six hours, Jack." He leaves Jack in the hotel room, alone.

Cheech makes himself a bit of a Dagwood sandwich, smothered in caviar, and settles into a recliner to watch Exposé [Editor's Note: Which, how dare they?! They know how we feel about Nikki and Paolo!!! -- Mindy], when he's disturbed by a furious banging coming from a side door. He opens the slider to find Hurley -- with a still-out-cold Sayid slung over his shoulders. Hugo says, "Hey Dad, how's it going?" And Cheech's face says, "I smoked way too much weed in my youth to handle this now, maaaaaaaaaaan." Mom's out shopping and Dad hasn't seen the news yet. They check Sayid, who's breathing -- but barely. Hurley explains he was shot by a dart. Cheech asks if they were in a zoo or something. I start wishing I was watching Exposé, because Cheech gets on my nerves after two minutes (I think it's the hair color; oh and the fact that his character walked out on his family and came back only once his devastated son won the lottery). Anyhow? His time is up as far as I'm concerned. Hurley spews about the safe house and getting jumped, and Sayid getting tranqued, and about Sayid pulling him out of the mental institution because he was in danger (as is Sayid). When Dad wants to know who poses the threat -- Hurley acts like he's lying when he says he's not exactly sure, even though as near as I can reckon, he can't be exactly sure. Then the phone rings. Oh, wait, it's the intercom. The LAPD is outside the mansion gate, looking for Hugo. Cheech agrees to cover for his son, provided that he then tells him the truth.

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