Lost

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Sacrificial Ham

The same group walks through the jungle -- the strength of Haughty Snotty's radio signal is their sherpa -- but the radio isn't coming in now the way it was on the beach, so I'm not going to think too hard about this method of finding the tower, because it seems like the writers and directors didn't. Danielle seems to have a contraction, but assures her husband it was only a kick. They playfully argue about whether the baby will be a boy (Robert thinks so, and declares his name will be...er...the French Alexander) or a girl (Danielle says her name will be Alexandra). Jin looks on just a little too long, then averts his eyes. Robert wants Danielle to have some water, so they start looking for Nadine-with-the-canteen, who seems to have gone looking for poutine. Hey, maybe Dharma drops some in on those pallets. You don't know. Maybe Dharma uses poutine to construct the pallets. Haughty Snotty starts snitting that "this" is what happens when you bring "women" and that Nadine-with-the-canteen is probably off looking for "butterflies." Oh yes he does, but don't worry, poppets. He'll get his. Unfortunately, not before Nadine-with-the-canteen gets hers. Everyone looks and listens, but all they see and hear are the sights and sounds of the jungle -- chirping birds, buzzing insects, and the rattle-rattle-rattling of the SMOKEOSAURUS! Smokey, get Haughty Snotty, please. Crap, I jumped the gun. Danielle calls her team's attention to Smokey's "Jungle Songs for Electric Catarrh" (sorry). Robert asks what it is. The camera zooms in on Jin who says, "Monster."

Danielle wants to backtrack and find Nadine-with-the-canteen, but Jin insists they must go. Haughty Snotty tells him to shut up (I HATE this guy) and leads the team to their eventual doom. Reluctantly, Jin follows behind. The French frantically scream for Nadine, to no avail. Robert orders everyone to spread out and search. Just then, a landmine explodes, and Smokey starts roaring. And who should appear but Nadine...or her corpse, that is. She falls straight down from above, landing bloody at poor Danielle's feet. Jin screams for everyone to run, and they actually get the point, this time. Mr. Shut-Up is right out in front, which is just excellent. We finally see Smokey, who descends upon Haughty Snotty and drags his shut-up-ass through the jungle and into a hole that sits at the base of a Temple of sorts. The Temple I guess, where the Others were supposed to go during the great island relocation project, right? Everyone holds onto Haughty Snotty, but Smokey wins this game of wishbone. He gets all of Haughty Snotty into his lair...er...all except for his right arm, which Robert wins, but then hilariously flings aside. Oh Show, you're so gross. Didn't Vincent once bring someone an arm? How old was it? I mean, was there still meat on it? Was it rotting/rotted? I only have the vaguest of memories. ["I thought that arm belonged to the guy who drove the van? But I can't say for sure if that guy had one or two arms when they took him out so they could have their beer-filled joyride, and Vincent found another arm somewhere else and the van thing was a weird coincidence." -- Angel] Also, I'm suddenly thinking about Dr. Pierre Chang's glaring lack of an arm, and wondering how that happened, since he had both arms in the Marvin Candle flashback we got this season.

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Lost

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