Locke's on the hunt...for a flashback! He's sitting on his bed, talking on the phone to Helen. He says he never felt so alive as when he told Randy off. He seems to have actually quit his job, rather than take vacation time. "That's wonderful. I'm happy for you, John, really," says Helen over the phone. Gosh, why isn't he telling her this in person? Shouldn't he be sharing his good news with her over a cappuccino at their local independently-owned coffee shop? Locke mentions the authentic Australian walkabout he's been talking about for weeks, and says he's made his reservation. In fact, he hopefully mentions, he's booked two tickets. But of course, Helen doesn't want to go, because ... .... . / .. ... / .- / .--. .... --- -. . / ... . -..- / --- .--. . .-. .- - --- .-. --..-- / -.. ..- ....! The rest of this scene is foolishness, other than that apparently she charges $89.95 an hour. That seems like an awful lot to pay when Locke could ask any random woman on the street to go to Australia with him and get rejected for free.
Kate asks Mercutio to wait a moment while she sets up Sayid's antenna. "You're gonna climb that?" Mercutio asks, pointing at the gigantic tree she's preparing to mount. "Don't worry, I've climbed a lot worse," she says. Heh. Your mom climbed a lot worse. Mercutio looks happy to sit down and stare at her ass as acclaimed actress Kate Beckinsale, the star of Van Helsing, scampers all the way up the tree in one impressive take. When she gets to the top, though, a sudden nearby roar startles her and she drops Sayid's antenna. It's the Iron Giant, stomping around the jungle. We get a nice shot of the trees bending and smashing as it passes by.
Locke has chased the boar into a little clearing when he's stopped short by the Iron Giant. (So's the boar, by the way. Wham!) He stares up as something big parts the branches above him and roars. No, you don't get to see anything. Nothing but a bunch of commercials.
Midsection Beach. Sawyer shame-facedly hands Claire a bunch of wallets he looted from the fuselage. Dollars to doughnuts those wallets have been stripped of condoms. Meanwhile, Walt asks Sun what the little green plant she's tending to is for. She plucks off a leaf and demonstrates brushing her teeth. "I get it, it's like toothpaste," Walt says, and then she teaches him, for some reason, the Korean word for "nuts." At least according to my friend Denny, who speaks Korean. Walt sees his dad and Kate returning from the hunt and runs to them, very impressed by his dad's wound. "Does it hurt?" he asks, and his dad assures him, in an extremely pained voice, that it barely hurts at all. "So it was like a boar fight?" an excited Walt asks. Awww. "Not so much a fight," says Mercutio. "More like, you know, me getting gorged [sic]." Uh, en-gorged, maybe, when Kate climbed that tree. "Where's Mr. Locke?" Walt asks.