Ben's House: Widmore and Zoe want to hide from Locke. Miles decides to run. Ben's doing neither. And Richard? He still thinks this is about him. "I'm gonna talk to him. I know this man. All he wants is for me to join him, and if I can get him to leave with me, maybe that'll give the rest of you a chance." Oh, honey, no. Miles says, "Good luck with that," and takes off. Richard and Ben go outside. Faucke's in full Smokey form, now. He ticka ticka rattle clank thumps his way to New Otherton, scoops up Richard and flings him into a tree. Out of our whole host of characters, Guyliner L. Manbelline (the "L" is for "Love"), I never thought you'd be too stupid to live. Maybe he's not dead. We don't see the body. Right? Right? He's still gotta be under Jacob's immortality blessing/curse. (Do not ruin my delusions.) Ben's shaky as he makes his way back to the porch. Once he sits, Faucke appears from behind another cabin. Ben offers him a glass of lemonade, which just kills me. Speaking of, Faucke has some people he wants Ben to kill. Ben: "Why would I do that?" Faucke: "Because once I leave this island, you can have it all to yourself." Ben: "All right." He's conning Faucke, right? If he is, he's good at it (which we've known forever) because he quickly gives up Widmore and Zoe's hiding spot in his secret room.
Sideways: Ben, still in his sling, is leaving school when he drops his keys. Alex Rousseau happens upon him and asks how he got hurt. Ben: "I found myself confronting someone who had a bit of a temper." Alex: "What? Why would someone want to hurt you? You're like -- the nicest guy. Ever!" Ben: "Guess they had me confused with somebody else." Not at all. Anyhow, Alex insists that Ben meet her mother, and come home with them for Coq Au Vin night. He doesn't want to be any trouble. Alex: "Dr. Linus, please. You've got one hand. You look like Napolean." Only 'cause he is, child. Danielle won't take no for an answer, either. "We insist. Even if we have to kidnap you." Hee! By the way, how well does Mira Furlan clean up? Also, on a scale of 1 to Hell, how wrong is it that I'm sort of shipping Rousseau and Sideways Ben? I can't help it, you all everybody. Back at the Rousseau residence, Ben and Danielle get acquainted as they clean up after dinner. He learns that Alex's father died when she was two, because whatever happened happened, and is touched when Danielle explains how attached her daughter has become to the kindly teacher. "All the interest you've taken in her. All the help you've given. You're the closest thing to a father she's ever had." And then, Ben chokes up. Rousseau: "Are you all right?" Ben: "I'm fine. I'm sure it's the onions." The already cooked and eaten onions? Ben, you left all your lying skills in the other reality. Rousseau is a chic French chick, so she's magically gifted with men. "Oh, I'll put in less, next time."
Islandways; New Otherton: Ben leads Faucke right to Widmore and "his lady friend," noting "She's armed, but I'm guessing that's not a problem for you." As Faucke approaches the secret room, he tells Ben to wait outside. "You don't need to see this." Alex's pictures are still all around the place. Ben: "I want to see this." Oh, Ben. Inside the secret room, Faucke cracks that it's nice to talk to Chuckles without all those fences between them. He then asks Zoe who she is. She tells him her name, but Charles stifles her before she says anything else, so Faucke slices her throat. HOORAY! Maybe Faucke is good after all. Widmore: "Why would you do that?" Because he's an angel sent from above (via down below), Charles. Faucke: "You told her not to talk to me. That made her pointless." Oh honey, she was pointless long before then.
Faucke then gets down to the nitty-gritty. He knows Widmore's weakness. It's not his own life; it's Penny's. (In another reality, Penny sings a different tune.) That loosens Charles' tongue. He tells him that he brought Desmond back to the island because of his unique resistance to electromagnetism. "He was a measure of last resort." Faucke wants to know what that means, but Charles won't say any more in front of Ben. Faucke tells Charles to whisper it to him, then. Widmore whispers into his hear, but then Ben fricking shoots him. Charles collapses to the floor. Faucke looks at Ben all AROO? Ben: "He doesn't get to save his daughter." Faucke wipes Zoe's blood off his knife and onto one of Ben's clean, white shirts. "Ben, you never cease to amaze me." He claims Widmore already told him what he needed to know, so there's no harm done. Ben: "Good. Did you say there were some other people to kill?" Now, I'm rushing so I'm not going to go all sidebar here, I'll just note that I'm not convinced Charles is dead. Once upon a time, we were told they couldn't kill one another. Now whether that was a mystical rule that cannot be thwarted or a spoken rule with consequences, I can't say, but I'm not ruling out the mumbo-jumbo. Not on this show. Not now. Also, if Charles really is 3 steps ahead of Ben, the only way he came unarmed is if he was wearing body armor, right? Eh. We'll find out soon enough, I suppose. Having the end this near has really taken the zing out of speculating for me.
Jungle; Night: Hurley leads the rest of the Fab Four to Jacob's magical ashy campfire and is confused (and maybe a little disappointed) when he realizes they too can see Jacob. Kate's got no time for Hurley's ego. Her own is in dire need of a massage. Once Jacob confirms he's the one who wrote their names on the wall, she asks if Sun, Jin and Sayid are dead because of that. Jacob doesn't give her a direct answer, because this is not The Vampire Diaries. He just says he's very sorry. Kate's all sorry ain't gonna cut it, Bub. "I wanna know why. I wanna know that Sun and Jin, and Sayid didn't die for nothing." At that, Jacob invites them to sit by his fire. "I'll tell you what they died for." He waits a beat and hopes that we notice he got to say the penultimate episode title, and then: "I'll tell you why I chose them, and why I chose you. And then I'll tell you everything you need to know about protecting this island, because by the time that fire burns out, one of you is gonna have to start doing it." Everybody, including Jacob, looks at Jack as if to say: Sheesh. I hope to high heaven it's him.
Sideways; Day; Jack's Office: Locke's ready to rock and roll. The prospect of walking again hasn't swayed him to take the advice of his surgeon. Oh, no. The advice of a Felix Unger-esque history teacher who got beat up by the same man who ran Locke down, but claims to want to teach him how to let go -- that's swayed Locke to have the surgery. And Jack, who was chin-deep in eerie coincidence two weeks ago -- he's the voice of reason. That said, he agrees to do the surgery. "I want to fix you, but I think you're mistaking coincidence for fate." The echoes of a thousand episodes (or 120) roll through my brain. Locke: "You can call it whatever you want, but here I am. And I think I'm ready to get out of this c