Love Cruise
Slinging Mud

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Slinging Mud

The overly serious credits begin with a definition of rivalry over a split screen of Anthony and Michael. The definition is, "Two striving to obtain what only one can possess." Tonight, the power struggle will escalate, and someone will pay the price for his or her innocence. And don't forget that there is $200,000 and a trip around the world on the line. Two more people will be banished to Loser Island, but sadly there is no shot of the goats to represent Aruba this time. Let's do it.

Previously on Love Cruise: Lisa stroked her hair a lot, and ruined Greg and Toni's budding relationship, because she ruins everything. Everyone thought Jeanette had called Adrian a deadbeat dad, even though she claimed that she didn't. As a result, Greg and Jeanette were voted off. Anthony picked Lisa as a partner, because her low self-esteem made her easy prey. Like any predator, Anthony goes after the young (Laura) and the weak (Lisa). Michael continued to fly under the radar.

Round Four. Ten Singles Remaining. Day Seven. Michael shoots a really cheesy wink at someone. In an interview, Michael says that he's persuasive, and that he can convince the men to vote the way he wants. He has made friends with some of the girls, hoping to influence their votes as well. Overall, he feels that he's "become kind of a chess master on board." That's great, but I worry that he's making his power move too early.

Anthony feeds Lisa some crap to the effect that he thought he made a love match with Laura, but it was bull, and he doesn't want to be manipulated by women, because he's true to himself. Who talks like that? I can only imagine how shitty his alleged screenplays are if that's how he speaks. What would you do if you saw a movie where one character said things like, "I live true to only me, and that's what I'll be for the rest of my life"? I would laugh and laugh. Michael voice-overs that Anthony has been playing the game from the start by trying to make "inroads with some of the women," so he's moved up to the top of Michael's threat list. Anthony continues furiously shoveling the bullshit with Lisa, who voice-overs that Anthony "has this complexity that [she's] never seen with anybody else." I can't believe she's buying his crap! Anthony feeds Lisa's ego by giving her compliments, and she's all, "Oh, really?" and fluttering her eyelashes. God, I loathe her. She fishes for compliments all the time, and then acts like she can't believe that the men are saying such nice things to her. Ugh.

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Love Cruise

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