Mad Men

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Couch Baron: B | Grade It Now!
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Where Have You Gone, Dick Whitman?

...and we cut to Rachel, who looks chagrined once someone informs her via intercom that Don is calling for her. She eventually answers, and Don expresses the desire to meet up with her. She's extremely reluctant, but he tells her it's important, so she agrees to lunch the next day in the tea room at the Pierre. I hope that's not where Joan and Roger conduct their assignations, because that would make for one awkward afternoon back at the office. When they hang up, Rachel looks pensive, and Don goes back to looking at the photo of the Israeli woman on the magazine cover.

Back from the break, Betty is starting to get undressed for bed and making offhand comments to Don, who's reading Exodus and clearly not really listening to her. Yup, she's got him, all right. She attracts his attention, however, by saying the first boy she ever kissed was Jewish. It seems pretty clear at this point that the first boy you married was also Jewish, the usage of "was" being significant rather than lazy in this case. Don perks up, and asks how that happened, and apparently, one of Betty's childhood pals had a Jewish friend, and she invited them to a charity fundraiser at her synagogue. A boy named David Rosenberg (I personally have known two of those) danced with her all night. Don asks if he was a good kisser, which between most couples would seem light and normal but is oddly creepy coming from him, and Betty responds that she thinks he had had a lot more practice than she. The next day, Beth, the Jewish girl, told everyone Betty was necking with David Rosenberg, which I guess means that if Betty knows only one Yiddish word, it's got to be yenta. Betty finishes the story by saying that the girls all gave her looks, but were all blondes by the next summer. So...they all wanted to make out with David Rosenberg? He must have been a really good kisser. Not speaking of which, Betty leans in and kisses Don for a bit, but when she realizes he's not even as into it as Salvatore would be, she stops. Don tells her it's hot, and he has to read the book, and Betty too-brightly agrees. She tries to save a little face by suggesting they get an air conditioner in the bedroom, but Don noncommittally replies, "We'll see." Betty heads into the bathroom, probably to silently castigate herself. As well she should -- directly telling your spouse you want to be with him is no way to conduct yourself in marriage! Also, Don's kind of a dick.

Ken and Salvatore go into an older guy named "Frederick"'s (I think he's new to the show; the AMC site describes him as a "lifelong midlevel copywriter") office; after some talk of a Mickey Mantle glove theft that I'm guessing actually happened, Salvatore makes a snide comment about waiting for Frederick to finish his breakfast, and Frederick opines that a day without orange juice is a long day indeed. That may well be true, but a day where the breakfast orange juice includes vodka, as indicated by the bottle of the stuff on your desk, can be not only long but also quite ugly. Hypothetically speaking, of course. Anyway, the topic is lipstick; the client makes tons of different shades, but the sales are crap, and Salvatore opines that maybe that's due to the cheesy names the company gives all the colors. Ken asks if they knew that lipstick was created to simulate the flush on woman's face after you nail her. Frederick stares at him: "If you're going to quote the research report, don't start with 'did you know.'" Heh, and also, I was wondering why Ken used the euphemism "treat her right" instead of something vulgar (like some people I could mention), but if he was quoting right off the page, it makes a lot more sense. I could be imagining things, but if that was done on purpose, it's a deft touch. Everyone laughs at Ken's ineptitude, and Frederick says he doesn't really understand the research, as he doesn't speak moron. "Do either of you speak moron?" When Ken and Salvatore shake their heads, Frederick suggests they "throw it to the chickens." What, is it Pete's day off?

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