Mad Men

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A+ | 3 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
"Mr. Campbell. Who Cares?"

...and then we're back in Korea, and it's brightly sunny as Dick digs away. Don hears an incoming and jumps in the trench with Dick just as a rocket explodes very near them. Dick, in a panic, asks what to do, and Don cautions him to keep his head and not shoot at anything unless it shoots at him first. A few more explosions occur, and then comes the unnerving silence. They wait a short length of time, but Don then decides the danger's over and stands and laughs. The TV cliché would be for him to be gunned down right there, and once again, the show skirts the obvious possibility. Dick gets to his feet and asks if the enemy will be back; as he lights a cigarette, Don says he doesn't know, but it helps that they didn't shoot back. As Dick goes to light his own smoke, Don smiles that Dick pissed himself; we pan down to see that's indeed the case, and Dick starts wiping the spot with his hand. Unfortunately, in doing so, he drops his ignited lighter right on some spilled gasoline. Don follows it and tries to stamp it out, but within a second, it's reached the numerous nearby fuel tanks, causing a massive explosion that sends Dick flying toward the camera, and bathes the screen in white...

...and then we fade back to Dick, lying in a hospital bed. This scene goes quickly back and forth between Dick in the military hospital and Dick right after the explosion, so I'm just going to do the same: Dick sits up, his left arm clearly injured. A voice asks "Lieutenant Draper" how he's doing. Dick staggers over to the gas tanks, by which we can see a bloody, mangled body. The presumably superior officer starts to read a ceremonial speech. Dick comes closer to the body. The colonel or whoever gives "Don" the Purple Heart. Someone else tells "Don" that his concussion was minor, and he'll feel like himself in a week. I'm thinking it might take a little longer than that. Dick stares at Don's body. The colonel tells "Don" that he's being released to the reserves for his last eighty days (remember that Don was almost finished with his tour of duty). "You're goin' home." "Don" presumably has enough of a handle on the situation not to piss himself again at those words. Dick, in tears, takes off his dog tag and throws it at Don's corpse. The doctor tells him he's going to be okay. We get a close-up of Don, whose face is burned beyond recognition, and Dick takes Don's tag for himself. So there's the answer to the mystery of how Dick became Don, and I should have guessed the bit about the dog tags, but only because it was a plot point in an episode of Fantasy Island that I saw when I was ten. The Colonel tells "Don" that he's the last person who knew "Dick," and they'd like him to take him home. "Don" has no response, so they leave him and move on to the next bed to greet "Lieutenant Nelson." If that's his real name. ["Is his name 'Armin Tamzarian'? Because that would be perfect." -- Joe R]

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Mad Men

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