...and we cut to them walking into the office, with Roger continuing that the book is titled Confessions Of An Ad Man, but it should be called "A Thousand Reasons I'm So Great." Heh. Don asks who's publishing it, and Roger tells him he'll send it over to him. "I don't want you to buy it." If these two really stop talking to each other permanently, my job is going to be a lot less fun.
When Don gets to his desk, he finds Pete, Sal, Harry, and Paul waiting for him, and seriously, they look like they're under a love spell, so intensely is the adulation for Don beaming out of them. I mean, they're kind of like that most of the time anyway, but this is extreme. Don starts to chide Allison, his girl (thanks to everyone that emailed me to supply the name) about letting them "hover" there, but she interrupts to tell him the reason they're smiling so beatifically: Conrad Hilton is in his office at that very moment. Don, betraying a little nervousness at the prospect, tells the boys to return in twenty minutes. Paul suggests he take as long as he needs, but Harry demurs: "He wants to look busy!" Heh. They're such a cheerleading section right now. Don opens the door to his office and then tells Allison to hold all his calls, earning him a hilarious "Duh" face from her, which kind of rules. Inside, Don finds Connie sitting in his chair and shakes his hand as he says seeing him is a great way to start the day. Connie: "Nine-thirty? That's practically lunch." Between that comment and the fact that Connie continues to make no move to give up Don's chair, Don is rather hilariously thrown by the whole encounter, but he gets himself together and takes one of the seats across from Connie. Before getting into the reason for his visit, though, Connie grandly announces that he finds it disturbing that Don has neither a Bible nor any family photos on his desk, and if he's really looking for a God-fearing family man to do his ads, he might do better to investigate other options. Like, as Bronzo would say, O'Gilvy. Don casually says he doesn't have those things because he's easily distracted, lighting a cigarette perhaps to punctuate that remark, but Connie thinks they're important: "They'll make you feel better about what you do." He tells Don to show up on time, earning him the rejoinder that maybe he was late because he was reading the Bible with his family. However, Connie isn't as easily charmed as, say, everyone else in the world, and he asks if Don's nervous. "I'm finding you hard to talk to." I'd get used to it. When Don points out that Connie obviously caught him by surprise, though, Connie quits grilling him and chuckles heartily before using a metaphor about cheating to imply that he'd like Don to do some advertising work for him. He also mentions that since Don's married, he'll "have to use [his] imagination" to catch his drift, but if Don's fazed that Connie's expecting him to be not only religious and family-loving but faithful as well, he doesn't show it. Those heathens are so good at lying. Anyway, Connie tells Don he'd like to give him the Waldorf, the New York Hilton, and the Statler Hilton. "It's just New York, but my eye has definitely started to wander." If Connie weren't such a God-fearing family man I'd be wondering if this metaphor was chosen to let Don know just how, um, alluring he finds him. Anyway, Don's on board, so they stand up, and Connie tells him that their lawyers will work out the retainer and other legal matters (ahem), but their other business will be conducted in communications much like they just had. On the way to the elevator, Connie warns Don that having him in his life will change things, and when Don says he looks forward to it, Connie replies, "They always say that." Words to be heeded, Don. They pass the boys from earlier, who don't seem to have given their goofy smiles a break, prompting Connie to note that they're a "happy bunch." Heh. Before they part company, Connie and Don shake hands again, and Connie tells him, "It's not much to start with, but I look forward to sharing my dreams with you. As long as you sign over your freedom in blood." Whoops, got ahead of myself there. Don turns back to a rousing round of applause, which he might as well enjoy while he can.