Peggy and Ken are with Harry in his office preparing for a call with Chevalier Blanc cologne, the impetus for which is that they've pulled their Beatles-influenced ad. Rick greets them and tells them sales have leveled off and when Harry points out that Valentine's Day is coming up and women need something to buy their dudes, Rick wonders why women would buy their men anything for that holiday. Inasmuch as I don't know why the holiday exists at all, I agree, but Peggy leans forward and says that it's true the Hard Day's Night ad was targeting women, but they can easily change that. Rick wonders how and there's a looooong pause (I'm sure someone in the room was counting the seconds) and then Peggy pulls an idea out of her ass involving Lady Godiva in Paris "as naked as we are allowed to make her" and we could of course discuss how Lady Godiva is getting prostituted here, but she's so far back in line I can barely see her boobs. The point is, Peggy's idea is a hit and I hope there's some of that lobster left for her.
The partners convene in Pete's office, whereupon he tells them without mincing words of Gross Pig's demand. I will say in the interests of accurate reporting that Gross Pig didn't explicitly say that he wouldn't back them if they didn't hook him up, but he strongly implied it. So Pete's probably right to relate this version of events, as much as there can be any "right" in CALLING A PARTNER'S MEETING TO DISCUSS WHORING OUT THEIR EMPLOYEE. Everyone is basically like, "Ewwwwww" and Don points out that there are three voting members, but Pete thinks the other two are yes men who will just go along with Gross Pig. He goes on that he brought the subject up with Joan and it's all Lane can do not to revisit using his face as a punching bag right there, but Pete goes on that Joan seemed "more amused than shocked" which I suppose could technically be true. He starts to offer that if they brought her the right amount, she might be open to it, but while the other partners are essentially silent (Roger is shocked that she'd go through with it, but he's thinking about himself as usual) Don is able to use his words, spitting that Joan has a husband in Vietnam and a baby at home and, by the way, the work will be good enough to win on its own. Interesting that Don is so quick to defend Joan by using her marital status when (a) he's the only one who knows about Joan and Greg's estrangement and (b) it's the complete opposite of his attitude toward Sal in an analogous situation that even lacked compensation (although he'd also caught Sal cheating, it's true). Lane can't believe Pete had the gall to even ask her, but Pete, his cards on the table now, fires back that they've all come too far and are too close to turning SCDP "into what it should be." If Don notices that Pete is throwing his inspirational words from the end of last episode back in his face he doesn't show it, but he does tell them they don't need Gross Pig -- end of discussion -- and then he leaves. Don, let this be a lesson to you not to leave until you're sure the meeting is over, because as you'd expect, Pete asks everyone else how they feel and suggests they give Joan a 10% finder's fee on the first year, which would be fifty grand. Roger offers he's not going to stand in the way "but I am not paying for it." Oh, you'll pay for it, Roger. This is Joan we're talking about -- I have no doubt she'll find a way to make you pay for it. And honestly, Roger not talking to Joan about this is a glaring sacrifice of character at the altar of plot. Pete suggests their bonuses could go to pay Joan, but Lane demurs and I wish his opinion on the matter weren't tainted so that not everyone in this room would be making me sick; on that note, the biggest disappointment is Bertram, who tells Lane that they can't put a dollar figure on a car. Having won, Pete tells Lane to have their credit limit extended and Lane, beaten down, says he'll check into it so they can have an exact dollar figure to offer Joan in the morning. Pete smarmily guesses there's no need to put it to a vote, as the present partners are 75 percent of the company, but Roger -- ROGER! -- tells him what they're doing is a very dirty business and remember he thinks Joan is willing at this point. I kind of forgot about that for a moment and it does make the rest of them a bit less culpable than Pete, especially since Bertram takes care to tell Pete that Joan can still say no. On the other hand, none of them goes to Joan personally and trusting Pete Campbell to be your courier doesn't indicate a deep desire to see the message delivered. With just two of them left, Lane stands and gives Pete a look of such contempt it makes me wonder if he'd have anything left for Gross Pig. I'd kind of like to find out.