Mad Men
The Suitcase

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A+ | 15 USERS: A+
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Float Like a Butterfly…

Sometime later, Don is recording some ideas for Samsonite when his tape runs out; when we cut to him poking around in a drawer in someone else's office, he sees a mouse scurry by. We then go back to him putting another tape into the recorder...

...and then, when we cut to Peggy, we hear his muffled voice calling her to join him. She initially refuses, hilariously petulantly, but he's insistent, and when we cut to her sullenly coming to his door, she finds him cracking up. A sense of intrigue temporarily overcomes her bad mood, and when she takes a seat she's not disappointed, as somehow when he was looking for a tape (possibly in Caroline's desk?), Don came across Roger's memoirs, and I remember thinking on first viewing that this was going to be good. Wow, did I have no idea. Roger is apparently calling his offering "Sterling's Gold" (oh, Roger), earning a hilarious WTF face from Peggy, and then we get to the really good stuff, as Roger says that Bertram hated him, and he first thought it was because Bertram thought Roger would be a staunch ally of his father, but it was actually because of his prowess with the ladies, including some time spent with "the queen of perversions, his secretary Ida Blankenship." Peggy literally gasps at this, as well she might, and she and Don silently giggle as Roger goes on that Bertram was "cut down in the height of his sexual prime by an unnecessary orchiectomy. Lyle Evans M.D. -- I think he had him killed." Oh, my God, too much information! And by that I don't mean I'm squeamish about anything Roger said -- it's just that the information is coming way too fast for my poor brain to process. Miss Blankenship used sex toys with Roger! Bertram is a eunuch! What am I supposed to do with this information? Oh, I know: HA HA HA! And I was at first wondering why Roger brought up Dr. Evans two episodes ago, but then it occurred to me that he was pointing out to Bertram that he himself has held a grudge for quite some time. Of course, he might have also been saying that Bertram's stance on the Japanese meant he had no balls, but I'll choose to believe even Roger isn't quite tasteless enough to intentionally go there to his face. But seriously: No balls! I'd take up Eastern philosophy too, I have to admit. Roger babbles drunkenly for a bit longer before Don clicks the machine off, and Peggy asks why he's laughing: "It's like reading someone's diary!" Honey, I think all but the most sensitive diary-keepers would admit that you just answered your own question. Don, however, explains it to her: "Ida was a hellcat? Cooper lost his balls? Roger's writing a book?" However funny you think the rest of the stuff may or may not be, I think we can all agree that Roger writing memoirs is the single funniest thing that has happened in the history of ever, and as such it's no surprise that Peggy can't stifle a giggle. Don gives her a drink, but she puts on her sullen mask again and says she should go; however, when Don encourages her to open up, she only hesitates for a moment before she complains that she and Mark were supposed to have a romantic candlelit dinner, and instead he invites her mother? "He doesn't know me. It's not my fault." She says she's back to square one, and hilariously and kind of adorably gives a faux-enthusiastic smile about being "Single!" Don: "Well, as Danny would say, there's no use crying over fish in the sea." HA! Poor Danny. This gets a real laugh from Peggy, but moments later she gives a cry of fright as she sees the mouse from before, or at least that's what we all hope. Don looks for it for a while, but it's gone, prompting him to tell Peggy, "There's a way out of this room we don't know about." Peggy doesn't ask him what the hell he's talking about/on, and she's saved from thinking about it by the phone in her office ringing, which she declines to answer. Instead, Don offers to take her out for her birthday...

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