He laughs at her before standing and saying he's going to "riff" for a bit and "'speechetize' the whole Vicks experience," which is good in that I'm back to wanting to impale him with all those sharpened pencils at once. Peggy's about where I am, as she sarcastically asks if she should come back when he's through, and he calls her "toots" as he suggests she transcribe what he says instead. "Someone's gonna want to get it down before it lifts off into the stratosphere." At the rate you're going, you'll still be attached to them when they get there. Anyway, they're sick of each other and at this point, I kind of agree with both of them...

...so let's head back to the ceremony, where the "Best Cleansers, Waxes, and Polishes" category is up, and if the ad categories are that specific I can indeed see why people get so wasted at these things. (Actually, Roger did mention that there were almost fifty categories. Shudder.) As the nominees are announced, Roger squeezes Joan's hand under the table, and then when Don asks Joan how he looks, Joan gives him an appraising look that goes on just a little too long, if you ask me, before telling him, "Great." Joan! Is your husband even on the plane yet? And if so, what happened to my party invitation? Don takes her other hand, and then when Glo-Coat wins, gives her a kiss on the lips before heading up and grabbing the award.

They play the ad, and we don't get to see all of it but it looks like the apparently controversial part was that the housewife in it seemed to be keeping her cowboy-dressed son in some sort of makeshift "jail" made of chairs in the kitchen until the floor got clean. I'm sure it would make more sense if I could hear the dialogue over the applause, but I don't really care and besides, Megan shows up and breathlessly tells them that the Life people ended up renting a car and driving up from Philly, and they're at the SCDP offices as they speak. Pete says they can reschedule, but Don's too drunk on booze and awards to listen to this prudent suggestion and says they should "put a cherry on this thing," and Roger backs him up. Pete's like, "This is the worst idea I've ever heard, to the point where I literally cannot conceive of even a tenth of the ways this could result in murder and destruction." Well, he actually only asks, "Really?" but the look on his face pretty much conveys all the other stuff.