At SCDP, Harry pops into Joan's office (Joan's! Office!), and she welcomes him back from his trip to L.A. with the usual supportive enthusiasm. Harry's forehead, it should be noted, is sunburned to shit, because he can't even stand around in the sunshine without fucking it up. I used to really like Harry, but fucking over Joan the way he did kind of turned the tide on that one. Anyway, Joan smokes a cigarette and looks glamorous and says she would love to have a vacation. Harry gets defensive and is like, "Um, I was working very hard." He also asks if somebody's been using his office. Joan, unfazed by his shittiness: "Mr. Sterling doesn't have a television." HA! Excellent. He has Joan set up a meeting with the partners, which she dutifully marks down while Joey interrupts about something or another. Harry looks at Joan expectantly and asks if she wants to know what the meeting is for. Joan's disinterest could blast a hole in the Time Life building, but Harry tells her anyway: He sold the jai-alai special to ABC. He douchily tells Joan to fetch him a cup of coffee and a grapefruit juice and then doubled back to admonish her: "This is my news." Joan breezily assures him, "I won't even tell people after it's aired." Harry skips away, too dull to know how sharp that reply really was.
Don arrives, and Roger calls him over to speak. He dismisses Lane, who gives Don a "good morning" that is either icy or British, and I'm leaning towards the former. Roger hands Don the copy of Ad Age, and it's not good. The headline ("A Man From a Town With No Name") sounds John Wayne-ish enough, but Roger reads out the more damning excerpts: "'Donald Draper, or Don as he is known, perhaps in an attempt to appear humble, is a handsome cipher.'" Roger also notes that the article says he's married. "I didn't tell him that," Don grouses. "Didn't this guy check any facts?" "You didn't give him any facts," Roger retorts. "He had to make assumptions." Don contends that his job is to write ads, not go around bragging about himself. "Who knows who you are?" Roger asks, again giving us an existential wink. He says this was supposed to be a publicity grab for the agency. "This is a missed opportunity," he sums up. "You turned all the sizzle from Glo-Coat into a wet fart. Plus, you sound like a prick." You know, one of these days, the rest of the cast is going to go on strike until they all get lines as fun as John Slattery gets.