Make Me A Supermodel

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Jeff Long: B+ | Grade It Now!
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It's Hurtin' (Down In This Area)

Previously: The models had to dress up like candy and really be the candy. Tabatha was brought in to consult with the models on their looks. She made Jonathan cut his hair and she made CJ become a brunette. No one could have known how much CJ was attached to that blonde hair of hers. Branden won immunity. Nicole nailed CJ for having a "fuck you" attitude and Perou really hates Gabe. But, it was Chris who was sent home.

On the credits, they tell us that Tabatha is sitting in for Catherine Malandrino this week. Hmm, it doesn't take a lot for this show to lose its legitimacy. In fact, it takes exactly as much as Catherine Malandrino not being on it. Jenny Shimizu has some cache, but she's been away for years. Perou? Not doing it for me. Frankly, Marlon could be the most successful version of his kind of person in the world and it'd make no difference to me. I'm not really familiar with that many model managers/scouts.

It's morning and it appears that many of the models are slumbering in a starfish formation. Half nekkid Sandhurst and Laury "find" on the computer monitor a notice that says they will be picked up at 9:30am for their shoot. "Don't miss the bus!" The screensaver is a picture of Shawn with his arm around Branden. Laury is all "What the hell?" about riding a bus. There are apparently no buses in Miami. Welcome to New York, Laury. Of course, I'd lived here for half a decade before I ever rode one of the buses. They wake up the others because they are already dangerously close to being late. Branden slept with a facial mask on. Someone points out that this is odd, but I guess when you're 18, your skin can deal with being slathered in the equivalent of toothpaste for 8 or so hours. Seriously, have you ever done that before? It makes your skin so dry.

While Kerryn is in the bathroom, Gabe waits outside in the teensiest underwear. Where did this kid come from? Where did he learn to be naked all of the time? Maybe it was heaven. Salome and Jordan express that they are sad about the previous night's elimination. Jordan interviews that Chris was crying about leaving while CJ doesn't even seem to really care. Colin says that the elimination was "dramatic." He thinks that CJ's negative attitude is coming back to haunt her-- everyone's giving her the model evil eye, which is predictably sexy. CJ interviews that it's difficult to be comfortable when everyone hates you. Try not being so easy to hate? Gabe is still waiting in his underwear. So tiny, these underwears.

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Make Me A Supermodel

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