Making the Band
A Furor In Germany

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Pamie: B+ | Grade It Now!
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"I'm Not Here. This Isn't Happening."

"Erik Estrada, International Chick Magnet." Erik appears to be walking down the staircase inside a record company or something. He turns the corner, prompting twenty or so girls to scream and start chasing him. Erik is sporting a denim jacket that was all the rage of my seventh-grade class. The best part of this episode is just how much music they're using that's not O-Town's. Erik runs in and out of the building with the girls chasing him. He takes the elevator; they take the stairs. He ditches them on another elevator and runs out the door.

"I'm Keeping Him" reads the next title card. More establishing shots of Germany, in case you forgot where we were. Ashley's kidnapper is still talking to her friends as a clueless Ashley sits nearby, grinning like a Cheshire cat. The subtitles tell us that Susan is bragging that she's never bringing Ashley back to his hotel. "He's so trusting!" the subtitle reads. "How cute!" Another blonde girl is brought into the room. This one can't be a day over ten. She's very happy to meet Ashley, and hugs him. She just keeps saying the word "Ashley" over and over as she walks up to him. It's very cute. He asks her name. She breathlessly tells him it's "Maria." She runs away to get something. Ashley tells the girls that he's lost. Susan is now speaking in English to her friends as Maria walks back up with an O-Town shirt. Ashley tries to sign it, but Susan explains that Maria wants him to take off his shirt and give her his so she can have something he's worn. Ashley is really the best sport in the world. He goes into the other room and changes shirts. He's not forced to wear an O-Town shirt around Germany, looking like a complete tool. Ashley's apologizing that he's got to leave. The subtitles tell us that Susan's saying she has other plans for him now. "She'll tell ya," Ashley says. Everyone says goodbye to him. Ashley tells Maria that his shirt's going to be too big for her. Not that big, Ash. You're about the size of a ten-year-old German girl. Ashley and Susan leave with the crew still inside the apartment. The girls jump up and down in celebration.

"Still Worried Sick Over Ashley" reads the next title card. Dan and Jacob miss American food. They want hamburgers and pizza. They're in Hamburg, right? They fakely turn a corner and run into a group of girls waiting for them so they can scream on cue. Jacob and Dan do a bad double take and run away. The girls follow. Jacob almost eats shit on the rug. The girls have body mics.

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Making the Band

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