Then there's a jam session with a song called "Hey, Hey, Hey." A bunch of guys stand around sounding like Fat Albert rapping as they try to come up with lyrics that describe girls wearing clothes, hair, and shoes. Again, the lyrics are, "Buh-duh-duh-nuh care! Bee-nuh-no, fah-fo-fuh-buh-nuh- dirty blonde hair." Awesome. I shit you not, the closed captioning just summed it all up with "[scatting]." Closed Captioning is lying to the deaf, the luckiest O-Town fans in the world. Ashley says that he had an idea for a song, but he really only had a title of a song but he's calling that an "idea" and that song title idea was "A Girl Like That." Now these older, balding, no-rhythm-having fools are jumping around in a room like an improv troupe warming up rapping about "a girl like that." Trevor explains to us that what they're doing is called "vibing." I had no idea. Ashley and Trevor sit and watch as Rich and his old man friends all write this song for them. We get a montage of the "A Girl Like That" "writing" "session." Fortunately, we don't have to hear any of it, and we're treated to an instrumental break as we watch the boys watch the men write their song for them.
I love recording sessions, because there's nothing to recap. Dan's laying down the bad notes for "A Girl Like That." Even the closed captioning just has pictures of musical notes. No point in learning these words. After this episode airs, we'll never have to hear this song again. I think one of the lines is "smell your breath that has, you know, the onion rings!"
Ashley is still singing the song in another room on another day. Singing it to Rich, I think. Ashley brags that the song sounds like Santana. He uses an air guitar so we know who Santana is. Rich tries not to openly laugh at Ashley. Ashley says he'll be "seriously disappointed" in himself if he doesn't get a song on the record. Jesus, Ashley, haven't you been listening to what everyone's been saying to you since you guys started writing your own songs? It's not going to happen. They are placating you while they try to figure out what to do with O-Town. Rich is unable to speak a line of English that makes any sense. He says a sentence with the word "like" in it four times. I don't know why they keep telling us over and over again that people are writing songs for O-Town, O-Town's writing songs for O-Town and probably Clive isn't going to like any of O-Town's songs. I get it. We get it. Everybody gets it but Ashley, who gets it from Erik every night. Lame joke, I know. It's late. Sue me. Ashley says he really wants to get a song on the album and he wants to write sixty songs like Rich did. Rich quickly says that Ashley doesn't have to do that and that it's not normal to write sixty songs (because there's no way in hell he really did that, I'm sure, and he doesn't want Ashley getting him busted for lying later).