Making the Band
Band Of Brothers

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Pamie: B | Grade It Now!
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Five to One

Well, it's been a short time together this time around, but I feel we've all grown quite a bit since these boys busted back into our lives ten or eleven short weeks ago. We know what we will and won't put up with. We know that even when all we think we want is singing and dancing, we can't even really put up with the singing and dancing. We all miss old Erik, who busted out with some stupid-ass lines. We miss Ashley's compulsive need to shower constantly. We don't want to watch girls shove bananas in their mouths or have Trevor dork out in a hot tub. We don't care if Janie's happy with Jacob. In fact, the only thing that didn't change the entire season was our undying hatred of Jacob's self-righteous attitude. And now, season three, we bid you adieu. Then at the end of this recap, I'll bid you adon't.

Previously: Dan and Jacob wrote a song called "American Game." It's been in my head for thirty-seven hours now, and I'm thinking of suing someone. Clive's the one that decides whether any of the songs the O-Boys have been writing are good enough for their second album. He's not one to like amateur efforts, so the boys have their work cut out for them. A writer took great delight telling O-Town that Variety hated their live show and their album and their music and them. She asked the question, "Who is O-Town?" And in this episode, once again we watch the boys stare at her like, "Uh, why do I let these cameras follow me around, again? Seriously."

We open with strains of Basement Jaxx's "Where's Your Head At?" which is the scariest video ever, ever, ever. Shots of double-decker buses and the sound of British-y bells inform us that we aren't in Orlando anymore. Suddenly, there's a string of ambulances rushing. They must have heard how the Basement Jaxx video makes me totally cry and fetal up in fear. Boston Mike (in uniform) sits between Trevor and Ashley and announces that he's holding a fax from Shirley, the music critic from last week who had the burning desire to meet O-Town. Trevor rubs his hands in glee. He can't wait to see what she had to say about them. "Show Dave your first good article," Boston Mike beams to Jacob. Hee. Jacob can't believe that Shirley wasn't horrible to them. She said things like "More than a boy band," and "They show a passion for songwriting." The boys are pretty pleased with themselves. I guess it's a review for the show, though, because the article ends with, "Will O-Town's second effort make the cut? We'll have to tune in to find out." She must have just found out about this television show that follows around a boy band named O-Town. Maybe someone can tell her about this website that does recaps of television shows so she can "catch up" here on the last episode of season three. "Hoo-ya!" someone says. Can't even do that right. Not "Boo-ya" or "Hoo-wah." Hoo-ya. Makes me sad. Ashley's happy because the girl didn't gush about how great O-Town is, but still didn't say that the flat-out suck. "Jacob was actually nice to her, that's why," Boston Mike jokes. Jacob confesses that he wasn't that nice. They tell him that he was nicer than he usually is. I hate that they're making Jacob seem more like a real person to me, now. I hate it when I almost like him. Dammit! I know these are all nice guys but it's harder to do my job if I can't rage against them constantly.

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Making the Band

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