Making the Band
Breaking The Band

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Two Men Enter, Nobody Leaves

Random shot of an L.A. building exterior. Ashley's on the phone with Chuck. He's told that the meetings went "really well" and that Ashley made a "great impression." This means that nobody has any work for Ashley. I know this, but Ashley doesn't know this yet. Chuck says that a script "came across" his desk that he thinks would be perfect for Ashley. Ashley can't believe his luck, and is rolling all over his bed (with his shoes still on, by the way). Chuck asks Ashley if he can come in and read for the part. "This is happening fast," Ashley says. "It's awesome, though." Well, enjoy it now because tomorrow you'll be hearing crickets, baby. That's the sound of Hollywood. Crickets and the slow sounds of molasses flowing over your dreams. Ashley tells us again that this is all happening "really fast," and since he has no real time to do any of this, he's going to "hit the ground running." Ashley has a pillow fight all by himself. The saddest, most deluded pillow fight there ever was.

I love the twelve-minute commercial break MTV fits in here. Love it, love it, love it. A recapper's wet dream.

Establishing shots of Orlando. DisneyWorld. Then, suddenly, we're at O-Manor. Dan gets a text message on his phone that says Ashley wants him to call, but at the same time, Ashley's calling on the phone. Okay. Erik misses Ashley so much that he's strumming Ashley's guitar. Both Erik and the guitar ditched in one weekend for greener pastures. Poor Erik. Poor guitar. Erik is obviously jealous that Ashley has chosen Dan to be the first one he calls to celebrate. Ashley brags that he's got all this big-time Hollywood stuff happening. Obviously, he's not allowed to say anybody's name over the camera, so he just throws a bunch of words together like "director" and "part" and "offer," and then says that they didn't offer him the part yet, and then you realize that Ashley is really just stoked that he landed an audition for a role that so many people are going to audition for that my cat's got a better chance of landing it. Dan asks if Ashley's talked to Mike or Mike or J Records or anybody that will probably immediately say, "Get back on the Stairmaster and practice your 'Girl' lip-synching!" Ashley admits that he hasn't told any of the Mikes about what's going on. Dan reminds Ashley to get on the plane that he's scheduled to take home, and to call one of the Mikes to say what's going on. Dan hangs up with a "Peace!" and just like that, he's my least favorite O-Town member again. Dan tells us that he can't imagine the band without Ashley. The tears of pain on Erik's face tell us that he can't, either. "Maybe I could be the heartthrob," he wonders.

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Making the Band

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