Morose, Ashley is again stuck in conversation with Shelli. "I feel like I'm ruining your life," he says, upset. She's pretty adept at laying a guilt trip. Shelli does take a stab at the "it's not you, it's me" line, but Ash refutes it because she's been blaming him for everything the entire time they've fought. "The conversations we've been having are building up…to a final decision," he says in the confessional. To Shelli, he says it will be too hard to be together, and suggests not necessarily splitting up, but giving each other space. "That's the stupidest thing you've ever said," Shelli spits at him. "There's like four thousand miles between us. You want some more space? Why don't you go overseas?" If he had a snappy answer, the producers denied us the pleasure. Instead, we hear him talk about how distance alone isn't the problem: "It's me doing what I'm doing and having it take up so very much of my time and devotion and strength," Ashley tells us. "It doesn't allow a lot of room for love." One brain blanked, four to go. This is why they pay Jay the big bucks. "I don't want you to feel bad any more," Ashley says sadly, hanging up. Obvious background tunes play, oozing sentiments like, "She's the best thing I ever had," and, "Yesterday's gone with my love." Sucking a slushy, Ashley leans against a doorframe and frowns. A tear trickles down his cheek. America falls in love with our little bruised Angel. Well, all Americans under eighteen. Everyone else probably just sighs and turns on The Simpsons.
Next up: the first performance.