Making the Band
Mama Said There'd Be Days Like This: Total Request Live

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Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be O-Town

Abby wants to ask Jacob's mom if he was good at getting girls when he was younger. She says, "You know? Jacob wasn't actually all that interested in girls." Ree-hee-heeeeeeeeeallllly? Everybody tries to cover it up by saying that Jacob was "goal-oriented" and that girls were a distraction.

Sierra wants to ask Ashley's mom what adjustments she has to make due to Ashley's fame. I want to add here that I'm translating all of these questions from Teen Girl to English. Teen Girl has more of a roundabout syntax, like, "My question is for Ashley's mom and that is would be that if since..." and so on. Ashley's mom says she misses Ashley, and that's her biggest sacrifice. The crowd moans, coos, and then cheers. Screaming, screaming, screaming. FakeCarson says "unfortunately" they are out of time. She thanks the moms and says she had fun. I can't believe we don't see the credits for TRL.

Backstage, Trevor reluctantly forgives his mother and swears to us that he's going to get his doll back.

Dan tells us that he doesn't care what his mother says; he knows she loves his singing. He says he knows she misses him. Dan and Erik start singing "Wade in the Water" as everyone ignores them. Trevor once again tries to join in, but nobody wants him to, and he doesn't really know the words that well, anyway. Dan keeps charming Erik as the moms laugh and we fade out...

...and into footage from the O-Town DVD. What the hell? And it's none of your business how I know this is from the O-Town DVD. Jacob dedicates a song to the moms in a strange voice-over. It's "All or Nothing." Is that the right mom song? All the boys are now pointing, squatting, waving and wiggling, assignments be damned! Fists of passion are squeezed and then punctuated with rapid punches. Pointing of post-September 11 passion in fashionable pro-American fabrics is seen. Wiggling, crotch-grabbing, and forward bending of emotional turmoil is shown. Then, just when I can't believe this is still going on, my TiVo makes a noise. It has given up, and chosen to end this episode right here, answering O-Town's unending question of "Now or never?" I tried TiVoing this episode two more times over the past two days. Each time TiVo has refused to tape this episode, taping other channels entirely, or taping only the first half of the episode, proving that even machines are smarter than O-Town. It also proves that this episode was even longer than usual, as I tape two minutes before and two minutes after each episode and it still didn't fit in the thirty-four minute slot. TiVo wins this time, O-Town. Take that.

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Making the Band

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