Making the Band
Too Much Pressure

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Erik's Family Matters

Previously on Making the Band: Erik's birth father got in touch with him for the first time since Erik was one. He learned that he has a brother and a sister. Erik explained that there are bonds between people that are like spider webs, and that the bonds have to be "evenly strengthened between [them] all." Yeah, I don't know what that means, either.

Credits. I just let them wash right over me like when you know someone's peed in the pool but you don't want to ruin everyone's good time. You just keep your mouth shut.

The boys are in New York for an album-release party. I wonder whether it's for their album. The camera runs up to girls who act like they're excited to see the camera. Other girls are just standing around because they work there.

Some girl jams her finger into Trevor's ear and gets her picture taken.

They're at another Planet Hollywood as Ashley explains to us that they're very excited. The album debuted at #5. Ashley says that it hasn't hit them yet how "monumental" that is.

Some girl tells Dan that she's from Philly. Some other girl tells Jacob that his photos from Miami are hot. "It's ridiculous!" she fawns, almost spilling her glass of white wine on his head. She doesn't even bother inhaling before she's moved on to Ashley, telling him how hot he is. Jacob says that they're the "hot commodity," and that everyone wants to talk to them. We see two guys talking about how "natural" Jacob's sound is. I love all of the adjectives people are using to describe "sounds like me when I've smoked a pack of cloves." Jacob's next sentence to us isn't really a sentence, so I'll just write down the string of words he's put together to explain what happens when your album hits #5: "If you fall off then it's all the bad press you have to deal with and the stress of once you're there holding that position for as long as possible." ["Whoa, I see what you mean. I was going to try to punctuate that, but it's obviously impossible." -- Wing Chun]

Cut to a drunk woman addressing a crowd that isn't listening to a word she's saying. That's okay, because she's lying. She's saying that this party will be a moment that the boys in O-Town will remember for the rest of their lives, because it's the one moment that launched their career. How could she possibly know that now, anyway? I don't know. Is that what she's saying? Listen, someone needs to hire a writer for these people, because nobody's making any sense. They're just stringing words together that sound important. She says this: "Every band has that one special time that they remember and kind of what launched their career? If you are ready, J Records recording artist: O-Town!" What the hell does that mean? For real. And why is that first statement a question? And "if you are ready?" It's like someone took the opening lines, translated them into Swedish and then translated them back into English and then gave her the lines to say. It probably started as "These guys are hot on the charts debuting at #5. Are you ready for O-Town? Here they are!" Idiots.

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Making the Band

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