Married By America
Episode 3

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Doofus, Xavier, Ass-parilla

Egghead wants us to grab a pen. Come on, people, grab a pen! You heard the man! On Monday, they'll all get engaged through little holes in the wall! Couldn't you just die? Incidentally, I am not actually able to vote, because my broadcast of was delayed by high-school hockey and this didn't air until the middle of the night. How unfair that I am deprived of my opportunity to participate in the democratic process. Every vote counts!

Egghead gives the numbers yet again, and then he explains the whole premise again. And then they give the promo information about where the show is going from here, because they want you to think it's going to start sucking less any minute now. And then they show the door with the hole for your engagement ring hand to fit through. And then finally, this episode is mercifully over.

To sum up? It's like dentistry without anesthetic.

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Married By America

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