Second, we've got to pick teams, and Mike, as the winner of the most recent challenge, gets to assemble a team of his choosing. Sharone voice-overs that Mike should pick him. Because this show seems to operate entirely in Opposite Day mode, where someone says something and then the exact opposite thing happens, Mike does not pick Sharone. At all. Instead, his team will be composed of Jake, Lee, Tracy, Tony, and Sheetal. That leaves Sharone to team up with Faruq, Jenna, Whitney, Slim, and David. They'll be Team Red; Mike's squad will be Team Blue. Well, get cracking, kids -- those 400 Marines aren't going to feed themselves.

Since nature abhors a vacuum almost as much as Sharone abhors being passed over in team selection, he's become the leader of Team Red. And what better dish for them to serve than red meat -- specifically a steak. Because the teams have to come up with two sides, the Red Team seems to be inching toward a potato dish. Jenna, Whitney and Slim seem to think that's boring. David suggests potatoes au gratin. Well, that should spice things up.

On the Blue side of the kitchen, Mike is preaching communication to his teammates. Their main dish will be an apple/raisin-stuffed pork loin with natural jus that Jake will take charge of. For the two sides, Team Blue will make a roasted corn salad and scalloped potatoes. For dessert -- and yes, dessert is mandatory -- it's a Berry Napoleon. "These are Marines," Gordon scoffs when he hears what's on tap for dessert. "I don't think they do much puff pastry." Well, they don't go around telling anyone about it, at any rate. [I'm pretty sure we liberated France solely to reclaim their delicious patisseries. - Z]

Back to the Red team, where the steak has become a grilled skirt steak with savory barbecue sauce. The potatoes au gratin have added bacon to the mix, and they'll be joined by roasted vegetables with fresh herbs as the other side dish. For dessert, it's an apple turnover. Meat choices aside, the menus sound fairly interchangeable.