Betty: "Vaginally? Yes, everybody. But the first rule of faking orgasms club is, you don't talk about faking orgasms."
Masters: "Still not clear on this. Are you telling me penises are not magic? I am asking for science."
Betty: "If you honestly don't understand why women do this, you need a female partner. Or even just a female friend. Or like any friends."
Masters: "I am friends with science."
Betty: "No offense, but I love how you're so weird and you write everything down and pretend that you are a robot. I wish I had more robot friends."
Dr. Ethan Haas is a youngster in Bill Masters's department, whose main things are -- like in every role Nicholas D'Agostino plays -- a bright-eyed idealism and a little bit of trepidation. Today what he is all about is that Lizzy Caplan has come to work in the insurance processing department for Obstetrics, and he is in love with her even though he has never talked to her, which is a problem men have sometimes.
Ethan: "I can't wait to tell her how I am in love with her, she's going to be very happy."
Masters: "That seems backwards to me."
Ethan: "No, I'm pretty sure that when you like a girl, she has to automatically like you back, or else she is a bitch. And how could I be in love with a bitch? So therefore we are in love."
Masters: "I have to concentrate on my secret sex study right now, stop expositing at me."
Ethan: "I can't! I am a runaway freight train! She was a singer in a band and she's getting divorced from the bandleader."
Masters: "So she is not afraid to cross the streams w/r/t employers? That might matter later."
Ethan adjusts his fedora and climbs out of the raft he has built of imaginary love for a sec.
Ethan: "Now you exposit at me. Are you really doing your secret sex project?"
Masters: "I think that the Provost will present my proposal to the Board, even though he has tried to subtly tell me that is never going to happen."
Ethan: "He's friendzoning your proposal? You should totally ignore that shit and act like you're entitled to a reality where he does whatever you want. That way when he doesn't, you can punch him in his whore mouth."