Melrose Place

Episode Report Card
Pablo G: A- | Grade It Now!
Too Little, Too Late?

Well, it appears our time together has come to an end, my friends. Let's not be sad. Let's cherish the good times we've had. Like remember the time in season one when Sydney got murdered? Or back in season one when we had a cook as a main character? And I know I'll never forget in season one when Ashley Simpson-Wentz had crazy eyes. One day, we'll all look back on this and laugh. Then we'll cry together, thinking of what might've been and how we all wasted 18 hours of our lives on this thing.

The Complex Pool. Lauren, all alone with her hooker self, swims laps. Most likely trying not to think about where her life went so wrong. It was probably when she started having sex for money. She was a prostitute.

Sweaty Ella and Jonah collapse next to each other in bed after they finish getting it on. Shudder. Jonah wants Ella to be his date to a college mixer so he can show her off, but Amanda's going to be back in the office, so that's a negative from Ella. Ella's dreading the outcome of facing the mighty Woodward. Jonah gives Ella a pep talk about dealing with the situation. He says Amanda has never faced Ella Simms before. That's right. She's dealing with her derivative. Shake in your designer boots, Amanda! SHAKE!

Drew makes crappy breakfast for Riley in the Usurped Love Nest. Riley informs Drew that Jonah will be coming by to pick up the last of his stuff and move into Violet's old place. Drew quips that he'll miss the killer comic book collection. Hi-larious. Riley points out she'll miss all the art on the walls since it all belongs to Jonah. Ah, but Drew has a solution. He hurries off to a closet and pulls out a tiny painting. This couldn't be... could it? It's Sydney's painting! Thank God somebody found that damn thing! Drew says it's not much, but it's a start for their art collection. Riley's particularly fond of Sydney's work.

Cut to Amanda on the phone saying she can have the painting to her dealer today. She hangs up and suddenly there's Sydney. But Sydney's dead! Dead Sydney is particularly catty to Amanda. She asks if Amanda had to sleep with Auggie after tracking him down to get him to tell her where the painting was. Amanda's pretty calm about the fact she's hallucinating. "You're not real. Go away." She adds that she's not a perpetual screw-up like Sydney, and she gets what she wants. Amanda pops some pills and starts to walk out. Dead Sydney calls after her, advising her not to be so cocky, and disappears.

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Melrose Place




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