Melrose Place

Episode Report Card
Pablo G: C | 41 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
The One About Auggie Without Auggie
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Naked legs slide under sheets next to a bottle of champagne in a bucket. Lauren and some guy have just finished up and Lauren's clock watching. The guy tells her she's amazing. Lauren just rolls her eyes and gives the most unconvincing, "So are you." At this rate, not even Craigslist pervs are going to want you, Lauren. She's ready to go, but the guy wants her to stay until sunrise for an extra grand. She's all his.

Fade transition to another bed at the Cold Love Nest where Jonah and Riley are sleeping in the anti-spoon position. Strangely, Jonah's hair looks really long on his pillow like he has it in a ponytail. That's all that's interesting about this.

Pan transition to Violet carefully reading over a document. Slash cuts over the text reveal that it is a court summon for Violet under the charge of resisting arrest.

The sunset transitions us to Lauren hopping into the backseat of a car to shamefully change out of her hooker uniform.

Back at the complex, David is on the phone as he walks out into the courtyard. He's asking if someone's sure there won't be anyone home. He hangs up just as Lauren walks into the courtyard in scrubs. They exchange quick pleasantries before David has to scoot off. Lauren quickly runs into Ella who greets her with a teasing, "Lauren! Long night of making people feel better?" which Lauren quickly deflects with her serious doctor voice. "Let's see, we had two car accidents and a kidney failure [and a lot of stuff that was totally not having sex for money...]" She starts to walk off to go get a quick nap before rounds, but Ella stops her with concern on her face to say, "Hey... take care of yourself." Lauren nods back that she will heed the encrypted whore warning.

It's passive-aggressive stunted conversation time at the Cold Love Nest. Jonah asks Riley if she's just forgotten to set back their clocks or if she's actually an hour late for work. Teacher conferences, she explains. She doesn't need to be in to work early. Riley fires back a question about Jonah working on his treatment for Kendra. Oh, he's working on his treatment of Kendra, alright. After all this riveting discussion has subsided, Riley finally breaches the subject. "Where are we, Jonah?" Jonah doesn't know, but I do. You guys are in the Cold Love Nest. I've only been saying it for these last nine weeks or so. Riley states the obvious that they shouldn't be kissing other people if they're engaged. Jonah's attempt at wisdom: "Too bad in life there's no undo command." I wish I could command + Z this conversation. Jonah's next bright idea has to do with taking a road trip for himself to get his thoughts together. This rubs Riley the wrong way because she was just about to suggest they spend some quality time together. Incompatibility, much? Just then there's some loud banging outside the apartment. They rush out together to see what's going on and find Detective Rodriguez and probably a good percentage of the LAPD scrambling all over The Complex Courtyard. Riley asks Rod what this is all about. The detective asks if they know where Auggie is. The police found Sydney's murder weapon covered in his blood. Auggie is wanted for her murder. Oh, geez... is this investigation going to follow the suspects in the same order we were presented them? Jonah turns to Riley as if to say, "You kissed that guy."

Melrose Place