Men In Trees
The Caribou In The Room

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Wing Chun: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Why Can't We Be Friends?

Avoiding the girlfriend he thinks doesn't find him attractive, Patrick has run straight to the woman who finds him completely perfect: his mommy. He and Celia are sitting together on an ugly loveseat. He's stiff, clearly distracted, but Celia's eating popcorn and having a grand old time: "Oh, those Wayans boys kill me! They really do look like women, huh?" Maybe what we've seen pass for women in Elmo, they do. Celia notices Patrick's lack of engagement and reminds him that he loved the movie the last time they "screened it." Ha! Calling it "screening" when what you're watching is White Chicks is such a hilarious character detail. Celia asks if the popcorn is insufficiently buttered, and pokes Patrick, trying to jolly him along as she tells him he loves Movie Night. Patrick sadly says that he was supposed to be with Annie that night. Celia can't hide her smile as she hopefully asks whether they're having problems. Patrick says that he doesn't think Annie's into him, and Celia declares, "Never liked her." Too soon! He'll remember that when they totally don't break up! Rookie mistake, Celia! "Mom, we're not breaking up," says Patrick bitterly. SEE?! He says that they're just having "growing pains," but that they'll work it out. Celia, with faux-reluctance, says she's not sure they can. He asks what she means, and she takes a moment before imitating Annie's snore with ear-splitting accuracy. He asks what she's doing, and she says that Annie's snoring is worse than Patrick's poor yappy, now-dead childhood pet dog. Patrick asks how Celia knows, and she tells him that she heard Annie snoring at the office today. She makes with the per-snore-mance (sorry) again, and Patrick irritably tells her to stop. Celia says that she will: "But I don't know if [Annie] can." Patrick asks why Annie wouldn't have told him about her adenoid problem, and Celia says that Annie must know Patrick couldn't live with it. This has given Patrick a lot to think about. Like where he could buy really effective earplugs at this time of night.

At the coffee shop, Marin gets a refill, and asks Jack whether he feels better. He says that food helps, but adds that they should get on the road. I don't think Jack is necessarily up for the drive, but I'm guessing that handing Marin, with her month-old driver's license, the keys to his car isn't going to make his chest feel any less tight. Ian, perhaps reading his mind, suggests that they stay over. Jack hesitates a long moment, giving Ian an opening to convince Marin by telling her that they can see some museums the next day. Plural! Imagine! Marin's eyes flash like she's all over that action, but she immediately looks to Jack for his answer. Ian tells Jack they'll make sure to get his inhaler, but Jack curtly says he doesn't need one, and asks for the cheque. Marin smiles regretfully, and Ian tells her she's welcome any time: "I have a spare room." She nods, watching Jack, at which Ian adds, "You too, Jack," as an afterthought. Jack looks like a return trip to Anchorage is not among his plans for even the distant future.

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Men In Trees

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