Ugh. Okay, Jewel is an AWFUL actress, so I'm going to shorthand this: Jewel and Theresa know each other from when they used to sing together, though Theresa was "Winnie" then. At least, I think she says Winnie; did I mention how terrible Jewel is? Theresa supposedly moved to Alaska because Jewel talked it up so much, and Jewel is disappointed that Theresa doesn't sing anymore. Theresa makes a self-deprecating joke about how every singer secretly wants to be a waitress. Jewel sucks.
Patrick is practising his chopstick technique at the desk at the Inn when Celia bustles in with a picnic basket, promising that dinner is "a ton of fun on a bun." Patrick correctly guesses that they'll be dining on sloppy joes, but apologetically says that he's stuffed with dumplings. Celia, unpacking plates of the least sloppy sloppy joes I've ever seen (show of hands as to who's surprised Celia's sloppy joes are rigidly tidy? Thought so), tightly says that dumplings aren't dinner, but Patrick says that Mai calls them magic food, because they're so small, yet so filling. Celia doesn't answer, so Patrick sternly tells her she should give Mai a chance: "She's hen cool. That's Chinese for 'very cool.'" Celia squints: "She taught you Chinese?" Patrick says she taught Annie too: "She loooooves Annie!" "Oh, COME ON," crabs Celia around a mouthful of joe. "Mom-Mai's a trip!" giggles Patrick. Celia is brought up short by the nickname, and in her jealous rage is forced to pack up her dapper joes and leave in a huff.
Chieftain. Sam tries to pay for Jane's drinks, but she won't let him. "Miss your ship?" he asks cheerfully. Jane snaps that she isn't from the cruise ship. Sam says she isn't from Elmo, either. Jane says she'll take that as a compliment, and Sam rejoins that he'll try not to take that as an insult. Jane credits him with being "not stupid," and Sam replies that she's not shy, and asks for five minutes. She offers three, and they settle for four. Why Jane is acting like she has any other prospects for decent company tonight, I am sure I don't know.
Outside the Chieftain, Sam asks if Jane's cold. Jane says she is, sometimes, to strangers she meets in bars, but Sam explains that he's offering her his jacket, which she accepts. She asks if he's flirting with her, and he says he's been flirting with her all night. Jane smiles that she's a little out of practice. Sam asks what she likes to do for fun. "Pilates. Minute fifty-five -- your turn." Sam says that he has a chainsaw. Jane stops walking and, half-joking, asks him not to kill her. Sam explains that he does ice sculpture to unwind, after a day of driving his plow. Jane, with seeming reluctance, says that's hot. With Sam smiling warmly at her, Jane says she guesses they should call it a night, but then he leans in for a face-sucking kiss, which she doesn't bother pretending not to be into. He certainly sculpted the panties right off her. Jane breathlessly asks where Sam lives...