Mind of the Married Man
The God Of Marriage

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Meanwhile, back at the Binders', Donna is chatting with Karin (who I will again remind you is Doug's wife, because I know you don't care enough to remember these things on your own.) (Which leads us, I suppose, to the larger question of why any of you care enough to even be reading these recaps.) (Which, of course, makes me worry about my job security in these turbulent times, so perhaps I should just get back to telling you what happened on the show.) (Wow.) (If this paragraph were any more purposely parenthetical, it would be an Amazing Race recap). Donna describes the "Zen manipulation" she used to convince Mickey to agree to having a second child, but then the scene suddenly descends into what may ultimately prove to be most patently offensive moment in the (hopefully brief and in no way inherently hilarious) history of the series. You see, while the men are out being manly and laughing about blowjob stories, the women are at home having the following conversation:

Donna: Sometimes I'm really, really sweet to Mickey, and then, from nowhere, I hold back. Just to be mean. I don't know why, either. ["I do." -- Aaron] It's like I get in this place where he doesn't deserve to be complimented, even when he's done well. ["Me too." -- Aaron] It's awful, isn't it? ["I'll say." -- Aaron]
Karin: Yeah. We should all feel bad for some of the things we do to these men.
[Long, contemplative pause]

So basically, all the men can go out and party and be raunchy, but God forbid the women should ever show anything but absolute deference to their man. I guess I should have expected as much from Mr. Mike "Misogynist" Binder, but still. That's just wrong. Obviously, one of the many differences between Sars and I is that she would have (rightly) put her vitriolic sidebar after this paragraph instead of before it. I think we can all agree that that's why she's the boss, and I'm the one watching Mike Binder every week.

Later that night, Mickey is trying to explain the Stooge-job story to Donna, but she totally fails to understand why Shemp's presence would be funny. Or, for that matter, non-conducive to climax. The argument morphs to the bedroom, with Mickey getting all snotty, and also offering some meta-comedic commentary. "You can't explain a joke, Donna," he says. "It's like dissecting a frog. You can examine it all you want, but at the end of the day, you've learned very little, and the frog is still dead." "Now that I don't get," remarks Donna, and while I wholeheartedly concur, I can't help but point out once again that the image of a dead frog is, in fact, an excellent meta-commentary on the show itself. There's a great deal of whiny bickering about whether or not they get the same jokes, and then Mickey introduces some anti-meta-commentary by claiming to have been "humoring" us all this time. Yeah. I don't think so, buddy. Donna, on the other hand, actually did make me giggle a bit with, "It's because Shemp's a funny name, right? Ssssssssshhhhhhhemp… 'Hello, I'm Shemp.' It's funny."

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Mind of the Married Man




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