Miracles
Miracles

Episode Report Card
Daniel: B- | 592 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine. Literally.

Upstairs, Rebecca's frying up that big ol' pot of hot oil again, while Keel jabbers on his cell phone and Evelyn tends to Skeet's injuries. After getting off the phone, Keel tells Rebecca that it's all over and that the ambulance is on its way. Evelyn wants to know what happened upstairs, like it takes a genius to figure out that maybe Skeet fought Keel just like he fought her, but whatever. Keel stumbles off to…I don't know, he doesn't say. Rebecca takes the pot off the stove and slowly starts walking toward Evelyn and Skeet. The scene fades into the past, with Rebecca becoming the bloody woman from the mirror (although she's not bloody right now), and she's walking toward the iceman (the same cigarette-smoking dude that Skeet saw in his dream) and his mistress, carrying what looks like a cast-iron pot of boiling water, while the iceman and the mistress dance to "You Are My Sunshine." At the very last moment, the iceman sees her; she says, "See what you did?" and tosses the water over the two of them.

And now they're dead. I guess. The water killed them, I suppose, because they're now two dead bodies and the redhead is dragging them downstairs. Maybe there was a struggle that we didn't get to see, because she's been injured, a bloody wound over one eye. Somehow this wee thing stuffs the two bodies into the coal chamber or whatever and seals up the passageway.

Back in the present day, Rebecca's rather far away from Skeet and Evelyn, when Evelyn notices her and shrieks, instead of doing ANYTHING ELSE. Fortunately, Keel's on his way back from taking a whiz or wherever it was that he went, and he tackles Rebecca. The oil splashes onto the stove, igniting an instant four-alarm fire, and everybody hustles outside to watch it burn. Crazy whispers over the soundtrack, with the sounds of a door creaking. No! The rocking chair burns up! The photo albums burn up! My cool Scarface poster goes up! Heh. No, my Scarface poster would not burn, because that's the first thing I'd save. Um, assuming my girlfriend was safe and sound, that is.

The next day, Skeet and Rebecca sit in her truck and reminisce about all the fun times they just had. Skeet asks what she's going to tell her sister. "That my ex-boyfriend became possessed and tried to kill me," says Rebecca. Is there a Haagen-Dazs flavour a sister can whip out to make that all better? Rebecca says she might have to start believing in therapy, "among other things," and Skeet says that if even one person starts believing in miracles after he goes psycho and locks her in the basement, it was all worth it. Rebecca says he's lucky, since his friends came all the way up here and risked their lives for him. Then she does some "what if we met for the very first time, would things be different" speculation that frankly seems a little silly once you've tried to douse a guy in hot oil. Skeet just says, "I'd like to think so." He gets out of the truck, and Rebecca says, "I really did love you," and drives off, forcing Skeet to brood in the direction of her taillights.

Miracles

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP