Miss Match
Bad Judgment

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She's more attractive with the beard

Evidently, Kate hears enough, as she's on the phone leaving a message for Judge Blake about her dinner with Sergio that night.

Ramon strolls in with a "hey, good lookin'," a copy of episode one of Honeymoon Hotel, and a slightly sleazy air of '70s machismo. He promises that Episodes Two through Six will follow, but Episode One does have Freddy winning the Hummer as well as his little tryst with the thong-wearer. Kate wants to know where he got it, and Ramon actually tugs on his lapels as he identifies his source as a lovely lady in post-production. "She gave it to you?" says Kate. "I like to think we gave it to each other," says Ramon. Not only that, he just flew in from the coast, and boy, are his arms tired. Then Ramon, with a strange air of distaste, says the show should be called Infidelity Inn, not Honeymoon Hotel. You just know he's been waiting all day to use that quip on Kate, who just waves him away and pops the television in the VCR to watch. Filling the Jeff Probst role on this fake reality show is none other than Brian "Too Annoying Even for Fans of American Idol" Dunkleman, who sets up the show by saying one couple will win a dream home and five others will find out that dreams don't always come true -- "the hard way," he appends. Kate wrinkles her nose at the cheesiness, the ungrammaticalness, or the Dunklemania, or a combination of the three.

Extreme close-up of Claire ordering, via headset telephone, a bottle of Veuve Clicquot or whatnot to be sent to Michael Mendelsohn, and she manages to get snotty with the person on the other end by explaining that "it's a party; someone should be there to sign for it." She turns away, and there's Lauren, dropping off an envelope. Do you think she heard about the party?

Claire, Kate, and Nick have dropped all pretense of doing actual work and are actually munching on popcorn while watching Honeymoon Hotel, and I'd just like to say that people who use the office microwave to make popcorn should be locked up in a poorly ventilated room and forced to breathe in that nasty stinky non-butter smell until their nose starts to bleed. Anyway, Dunkleman is going on about the sun setting on Honeymoon Hotel and wondering aloud whether there will be "relaxation and reading" or "copulation and cheating," like copulation is just as sinister as cheating in Hollywood's hypocritical view. And Dunkleman says that what the couples don't know is that one couple isn't really a couple at all, and it's their job to lure one "weak spouse" into a cabana for a night of "sin under the stars." Naturally, Claire, Nick, and Kate are agog, with Claire exclaiming that the whole thing was a sham, which makes it markedly different from any other reality show…how? And Nick makes some joke about how Miss Fisher (shown kneeling on her bed all alone and forlorn) thought she was going on Survivor but actually wound up on Temptation Island, which I think translates as "Don't sue us; Honeymoon Hotel is not meant to represent Temptation Island," kind of like one of those "ripped from the headlines" episodes of Law & Order where they explicitly mention the real-life case during the episode as some sort of libel insurance, like you sit there and say, "Oh, this one's based on Susan Smith," and they then refer to Susan Smith on the show to try to pretend that this is a totally different case so as not to get sued for misrepresentation.

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Miss Match

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