Joss's new boss Olivier is already crazy hot because he is played by Mike Dopud, who is crazy hot, but then on top of it he doesn't buy any of her bullshit, which is like the sexiest thing in the world. While at first she thinks she will simply subdue him with sex, like her last boss, it turns out that what he really responds to in an employee is hard work, dedication, smart thinking and creativity. How weird, right?
To unload an unsellable monster mansion, Joss throws one of those big Hollywood parties where there's like Lamar Odom and Keith Richards, and also invites everybody except Savannah, who is at home figuring out that she is pregnant and accidentally using feminism to ruin Dominic's career. So he shows up to yell at her for being a woman, like happens to somebody in every scene of this show, and then April comes over to apologize to her for being so judgmental about Savi's recent one-night stand.
Savi doesn't have a lot to do this week besides feel weird about things and get into dumb fights with her dumb husband, but she more than makes up for it by having sex nightmares and being generally a joy to watch in every way, even as she's spreading her unnecessary misery onto everything she touches with aplomb. Also occasional bursting into tears, strange food aversions, mood swings, and boobs things, because she is pregnant with a baby and that's what it is like when you've been pregnant for ten whole minutes: Your body goes into a hormonal free-for-all.
Hot Dad Richard has been snubbing April ever since she flaked out on him twice in a row, and her explanation -- that a "person" showed up at her house bearing a "package" belonging to her dead husband, which caused her to "freak out" -- only makes her look like even more damaged goods than the truth would, and as he's adhering to a no-red-flags policy at the moment, they can't date until she gets her shit together. But April knows -- and I think somewhere in there, Richard also knows -- that there is zero chance of April getting her shit together, because she is a hot mess just like all of her friends.
After the Widow Grey visits Karen Kim to tell her that Sam is losing his shit and moving into the love den that Thomas apparently rented for the six weeks Karen was with him, Karen Kim makes the sensible -- and oh-so-Karen Kim -- decision of trespassing in there, crawling around on the floor like a crazy person, and leaving her shit everywhere. After another super weird conversation where she acts like today is her first day being a person, she brings hot coworker Jacob to Joss's party, but then Sam gets into a DUI accident and she immediately ditches Jacob to go care of it: Turns out Sam gave Karen's sunglasses to his mom, inadvertently alerting her to her husband's affair. Needless to say, Karen considers all of this very much her business. Needless to say, she is wrong.
Next Week: Sam kisses Karen, but she still hasn't figured out that they are in love -- that she is a pedophile and she is in love with a child -- so she once again rebuffs him, driving him into a crazy/adorable rage; Joss is maybe a lesbian but probably not yet; April finds out that Pete had seventeen other families all over the south, many of them ghosts; Savannah tries to figure out exactly what kind of a baby she is going to have.
In addition to everyone else, Joss was sleeping with her boss, which came with perks like easy real estate sales and the chance to leave your underwear places. April was sabotaging her budding relationship with Hot Dad Richard in many ghost-related ways, the last of which was a mystery baby her dead husband had with his secret other family. Savannah pissed her off by admitting she cheated on her horrible husband, and then desperately tried to get the magic back by sleeping with her horrible husband. And Karen Kim, she was just doing Karen. Doing like how Karen do.
1 WK LATER
Savannah: "That was so funny how we had sex!"
Harry: "Please don't touch it for like one second. I must insist."
Savannah: "Boys and their penises! Hahaha!"
Harry: "Seriously, that is like broken glass, what you are doing. At this point in the refractory cycle it's about as sensitive as your eyeball. You're not being cute, you're being mean."
Savannah: "I just love you right now, at this one moment."
Harry: "I suppose that we love each other. Hey, remember when you had cornrows and an infected belly ring?"
Savannah: "Does that turn you on, baby?"
Harry: "Christ we are the worst."
Savannah: "You're like the Beeper King to my Liz Lemon. Our love is hypothermia."
Harry: "Don't you have a job?"
Savannah: "I am avoiding my job due to reasons."
Harry: "Maybe you should go to your job."
Savannah: "Or the opposite of that."
Lucy: "Who's this person Miranda who keeps calling you?"
April: "Um, my gynecologist."
Lucy: "You should not have your gyno programmed into your phone by first name."
April: "Aren't you precocious?"
Richard walks his daughter by, looking all Hot Dad Richardy, and fully ignores April when she screams his name. Like he looks right at her, his face a death mask of You Fucked Up. April -- alone, of all these women -- at least has the grace to be like, "Well, April Malloy, you made this bed. You decorated it with throw pillows. And now you must lie in it."
DR. KAREN KIM, REAL LIVE PSYCHIATRIST WITH A MEDICAL DEGREE
Dr. Jacob Lerner: "So what is with all these boxes everywhere in your office, hoarder? Just kidding, I know you like to alphabetize your hard files whenever you are freaking out or done freaking out."