Who's not coming to dinner: A black baby, rendering this entire episode title a weirdly moot and random reference. They don't even have dinner! They have a party, which the entire guest list is: These four chicks, another chick, Hot Richard, two little girls and a bartender named Diego. Which isn't even a party, much less dinner. Much less anything that deserves to share a title with, like, the best movie of all time. Although it is pretty fucking good.
The big news: Just as Harry's packing up his double mezzalunas, his hoozits and whatsits galore, Savannah (and Joss)'s mother Janet shows up in all her ayahuasca-drinking, free-spirited, Running With Scissors, Flubber's mother horror. You know the story: She left them to fend for themselves growing up, always with the jet-setting, and that's why Savi and Joss are the way they are, the end.
Of course Joss is excited because she always thinks Mommy is going to stick around, but of course Janet's only in town for 24 hours before moving to Rio, so they throw her a big Brazil-themed party with a bartender named Diego and some caipirinha-fueled attempts at motherhood that leave mostly everybody devastated: Her assumption was that the Davis marriage was on the rocks because Harry cheated, not because Savi did.
Joss decides to run away to Rio to help Janet settle in, but after overhearing a serious talk about responsibility (THIS WAS HEARTBREAKING) and also Mom leaving the country without her (ALSO HEARTBREAKING), she realizes what a standup guy her sister is, and they finally reconcile. And while Savi isn't opening the DNA results just yet -- or telling mom about the baby at all -- she does give Joss the envelope, in a perfectly cromulent dash of emotional generosity that is sure to fuck everything up momentarily.
The acting on this show, when it is on, is impeccable. Worth watching just for that, some weeks.
Meanwhile, April finally tells Lucy that she and Richard are serious, which causes apoplexies of joy in her daughter, his daughter and himself. Of course, this is immediately interrupted by Paul's surprise of still being in L.A. -- but what looks like a choice between two men for April turns into something way more interesting: He's there to plead for clemency, and to see his daughter and tell her he's still alive. Karen does her best to keep April from being honest with the wonderful Richard, but eventually her better nature gives in, and she once again decides on total transparency. Good girl.
Also, Richard is even more adorable tipsy than usual. Man, he's something else.
New evidence shows up in the Thomas Grey case that supports a wrongful death and invalidates Elizabeth's insurance settlement. She's got money, so now we think this whole thing might be a plot to punish Karen for sleeping with Tom in the first place, and now includes faked psych notes that are wrong, meaning there are now three sets of session notes, all of which tell a different story about Tom's mindset before he died. It's iffy/soapy, but the show is at least brave about admitting it: The gals determine that the real point is whether or not Elizabeth helped Tom kill himself out of pity, or for revenge, to which Joss (of course) points out rationally that you're talking about a couple days difference.
Savi can't touch it because she's the lawyer, so Karen goes to a PI (named "Dingress" because this show can be amazing) and tries to figure out what the deal is -- but eventually gets hit with a lawsuit alleging her wrongdoing in his death. Whatever gets me more Sam, that's what I'm after. Keep your eye on the fucking ball, Karen. (Also, you went on a date last week with a PI who is totally into you and would do this for free, no Dingress necessary. But whatever, I guess we can't expect Karen to navigate the awkwardness of having written the fake notes for him in the first place.)
...I think that's everything. The episode ends with April coming clean to Richard about this new spot she's put herself in, and Paul's pretty valid request to see his daughter. Karen's finally on the hook for her many, many miles of bullshit. And Joss and Savannah are back together where they belong, which is two parts of one very huggy creature.
In Three Weeks: Paul beats up Richard (boo!), Joss maybe fucks up the Olivier and Alex dynamics both at the same time (double boo!), Miranda shows back up (hiss!), and Harry finds Savi entertaining Dominic in their home. All awful things. On the up, though, I think I saw Sam's lower lip and jaw at one point, so all is not lost.
In an orgy of dysfunction Harry issued one of his shittier ultimatums, leading Savi in turn to hide her long-awaited paternity results from even herself. Like all problems, babies go away if we just ignore them. The Widow Grey revealed that she knew about Karen's affair with Tom all along -- and did this in front of Karen's new stalker/suitor his son Sam, who is already very crazy.
Tweener Savi sat on a beach, staring with another girl as somebody they knew dropped her bikini top and waded out into the ocean, screaming for attention. But it's not Josslyn, because Josslyn is the other girl and she is too young for this behavior just like Mom is too old for it. Savi is reading a romance novel on the beach, foreshadowing her bullshitty beach bum life to follow.
They are wearing clothes and using technology, Mister Mister on the radio, but none of that interests me because I'm not into nostalgia but especially not '80s nostalgia because it is a cancer on your mind.
Savi: "She just wants that hot lifeguard to save her, don't worry about it."
Joss: "What if that slut dies first?"
Savi: "Just keep waiting, he'll blow his whistle."
Eventually he does. Or I guess did.
Savi wakes up from her realistically literal dream like people are always having on TV to the phone ringing.
Savi: "Joss? Is that you? Are you calling from that dream I was just having?"
Karen: "Kind of. I also have a tendency to drop my panties and run into the ocean with no exit strategy, for no reason other than that I am a hot mess -- and where you have a brain, I have a warm mug of Earl Grey tea."
Savi: "What is it this time? Let me guess, you were piloting a plane with the entire Grey family in it, accidentally mixed your medications, and flew into a mountain. No, Sam caught you in bed with his mom by some complete accident and murdered her, and now he's chasing you with a knife, so you sat down on the sidewalk to call me. Said something racist on Conan. Dating Charlie Sheen."
Karen: "Very funny. The part about me getting murdered, though, is accurate."
Savi: "Let's all go hang out in April's house in the middle of the day."
Savi: "How did she even know you were having the affair? You're usually so discreet and plan things out so well!"