Mondo Extra
2005 MTV Video Music Awards

Episode Report Card
Pamie: A+ | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Anything Can't Happen

Stee: But not Dark Water thank God.
Djb: "You're playing too close to the water, see? What if I'd gone swimming in the last forty-five minutes?"
Pamie: "These Chesterfields are amazing."
Djb: "They treat you right. Like a good dame."
Stee: "They're forty cents a pack."
Pamie: "Can you believe the price? I'm gonna quit when they hit two bits."
Stee: "What are these new things called 'filters'? It's a fad, I tell ya. A fad."
Pamie: "I find a good cough and a good shit in the morning really helps ya out."
Stee: What? Was that the first Chesterfield ad campaign?
Pamie: June Lockhart was in the commercial.
Stee: "I'm Yul Brynner, for Chesterfield. How do I keep my healthy glow?"
Djb: "Hello. I'm a slightly younger Dick Clark for Chesterfield."

Jeremy Piven and Lil' Kim. People can just go to jail whenever they choose? Piven says that Lil' Kim is about to go to the big house for lying, but that if they had those rules in Hollywood, everybody would be doing "twenty to life." Piven launches into the "What do I call you" patter, and suggests getting Lil' Kim some kind of Martha Stewart setup. Lil' Kim says she's suffered enough, and Piven walks off.

Stee: Jeremy Piven just Jumped the Fergie.
Pamie: Lil' Kim is toasted. "Give me a shiv, Piven!"
Djb: "Give me a shiven!"

Lil' Kim shouts her love for Miami. Lil' Kim: "Yeah, Miami and the nominees are!" That's not even a sentence! The nominees for Best Rap Video are: Eminem, "Just Lose It"; Ying Yang Twins, "Wait (The Whisper Song)", The Game & 50 Cent, "Hate It or Love It"; Ludacris, "Number One Spot"; and TI, "You Don't Know Me." There's an understatement. Luda wins. We get to hear the entire song as Luda makes his way to the stage. Luda says it's about damn time. His first award. He thanks: management, Def Jam, LA Reid, Jay-Z, LisaRaye, Verne Troyer, Quincy Jones, Fat Cats, his family, his mother, and most importantly God for waking him up to accept this award. Luda threatens that he's just gotten started disturbing the peace.

Pamie: Luda is the cutest boy in rap.
Stee: Dan, can you take the wine away from Pam?
Djb: Too late! It's hiding in her belly.
Stee: If it's hiding in your belly, tell Doritos to take the wine away from you.

Beavis and Butthead are back, dressed as Poseidon and a sea horse. Butthead says he knows that most winners will be thanking God tonight, but that he hopes they'll also thank the god of all seas, Big Daddy Poseidon. Beavis gives an acceptance speech. Butthead says "feces and manure." Beavis calls himself the lord of poop. Butthead says the voters need to vote Butthead back on television or he'll cause "earthquakes or something." Beavis gets speared. Giggling. Green Day is winning the Viewer's Choice Award. You can now go back to your lives.

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Mondo Extra

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Mondo Extra
2005 MTV Video Music Awards

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Anything Can't Happen

Stee: But not Dark Water thank God.
Djb: "You're playing too close to the water, see? What if I'd gone swimming in the last forty-five minutes?"
Pamie: "These Chesterfields are amazing."
Djb: "They treat you right. Like a good dame."
Stee: "They're forty cents a pack."
Pamie: "Can you believe the price? I'm gonna quit when they hit two bits."
Stee: "What are these new things called 'filters'? It's a fad, I tell ya. A fad."
Pamie: "I find a good cough and a good shit in the morning really helps ya out."
Stee: What? Was that the first Chesterfield ad campaign?
Pamie: June Lockhart was in the commercial.
Stee: "I'm Yul Brynner, for Chesterfield. How do I keep my healthy glow?"
Djb: "Hello. I'm a slightly younger Dick Clark for Chesterfield."

Jeremy Piven and Lil' Kim. People can just go to jail whenever they choose? Piven says that Lil' Kim is about to go to the big house for lying, but that if they had those rules in Hollywood, everybody would be doing "twenty to life." Piven launches into the "What do I call you" patter, and suggests getting Lil' Kim some kind of Martha Stewart setup. Lil' Kim says she's suffered enough, and Piven walks off.

Stee: Jeremy Piven just Jumped the Fergie.
Pamie: Lil' Kim is toasted. "Give me a shiv, Piven!"
Djb: "Give me a shiven!"

Lil' Kim shouts her love for Miami. Lil' Kim: "Yeah, Miami and the nominees are!" That's not even a sentence! The nominees for Best Rap Video are: Eminem, "Just Lose It"; Ying Yang Twins, "Wait (The Whisper Song)", The Game & 50 Cent, "Hate It or Love It"; Ludacris, "Number One Spot"; and TI, "You Don't Know Me." There's an understatement. Luda wins. We get to hear the entire song as Luda makes his way to the stage. Luda says it's about damn time. His first award. He thanks: management, Def Jam, LA Reid, Jay-Z, LisaRaye, Verne Troyer, Quincy Jones, Fat Cats, his family, his mother, and most importantly God for waking him up to accept this award. Luda threatens that he's just gotten started disturbing the peace.

Pamie: Luda is the cutest boy in rap.
Stee: Dan, can you take the wine away from Pam?
Djb: Too late! It's hiding in her belly.
Stee: If it's hiding in your belly, tell Doritos to take the wine away from you.

Beavis and Butthead are back, dressed as Poseidon and a sea horse. Butthead says he knows that most winners will be thanking God tonight, but that he hopes they'll also thank the god of all seas, Big Daddy Poseidon. Beavis gives an acceptance speech. Butthead says "feces and manure." Beavis calls himself the lord of poop. Butthead says the voters need to vote Butthead back on television or he'll cause "earthquakes or something." Beavis gets speared. Giggling. Green Day is winning the Viewer's Choice Award. You can now go back to your lives.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29Next

Mondo Extra

Comments

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