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2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

Episode Report Card
The TWoP Staff: A+ | Grade It Now!
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2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

You can see the strain marks in the writing it takes to get to the massive punchline on How I Met Your Mother that reveals why Robin hates going to the mall in the "Slap Bet" episode. But once we get there, the payoff is pure gold. It turns out Robin was a Canadian pop star named Robin Sparkles in the '90s, decked out in an '80s bedazzled jean jacket for her music video, "Let's Go to the Mall." (As Robin explains, "The '80s didn't come to Canada until like '93.") The video was posted by CBS on YouTube in its full glory. Maybe it's just us, but we kind of like bouncy, tights-wearing teenaged Robin more than grown-up, stick-in-the-mud Robin. Ah, well. As long as YouTube is around, we'll always have Robin Sparkles and that awesome talking robot. -- Omar G

Best Imitation Of A Daytime Soap
Smallville has been silly in the past (see all of Season Four), but the storylines in Season Six made the show look like creators Al Gough and Miles Millar were actively lobbying for a Daytime Emmy Award. (Sadly, they were snubbed.) Chloe's mom, Lynda Carter, appears. Lana and Lex get married after Lana finds out she's pregnant with a (wait for it...) fake baby! Clark pines and mopes like he's been jilted on Young and the Restless and the love triangles extend out to hex- and sex-agons with the addition of Green Arrow and Lois Lane's romance. A little soapy? You're soaking in it. -- Omar G

Best Justification Of Fast Forward
Goes to Top Design (or was it Top Designer? I can't remember, I think I fast-forwarded through all the title cards). In any case, this boring and incomprehensibly-judged reality show had nothing to offer its viewers except a little thrill of unadulterated joy upon hearing Jonathan Adler's mind-blowingly awkward delivery of the sayonara line each week. "See ya later, decorator!" he nasally intoned, while each and every time doing a little head tilt and looking like he just farted. I'd fast forward through Whoopi hosting the Oscars to watch that! -- Drunken Bee

Best Network Haven For Washed-Up Actors

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Mondo Extra
2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

You can see the strain marks in the writing it takes to get to the massive punchline on How I Met Your Mother that reveals why Robin hates going to the mall in the "Slap Bet" episode. But once we get there, the payoff is pure gold. It turns out Robin was a Canadian pop star named Robin Sparkles in the '90s, decked out in an '80s bedazzled jean jacket for her music video, "Let's Go to the Mall." (As Robin explains, "The '80s didn't come to Canada until like '93.") The video was posted by CBS on YouTube in its full glory. Maybe it's just us, but we kind of like bouncy, tights-wearing teenaged Robin more than grown-up, stick-in-the-mud Robin. Ah, well. As long as YouTube is around, we'll always have Robin Sparkles and that awesome talking robot. -- Omar G

Best Imitation Of A Daytime Soap
Smallville has been silly in the past (see all of Season Four), but the storylines in Season Six made the show look like creators Al Gough and Miles Millar were actively lobbying for a Daytime Emmy Award. (Sadly, they were snubbed.) Chloe's mom, Lynda Carter, appears. Lana and Lex get married after Lana finds out she's pregnant with a (wait for it...) fake baby! Clark pines and mopes like he's been jilted on Young and the Restless and the love triangles extend out to hex- and sex-agons with the addition of Green Arrow and Lois Lane's romance. A little soapy? You're soaking in it. -- Omar G

Best Justification Of Fast Forward
Goes to Top Design (or was it Top Designer? I can't remember, I think I fast-forwarded through all the title cards). In any case, this boring and incomprehensibly-judged reality show had nothing to offer its viewers except a little thrill of unadulterated joy upon hearing Jonathan Adler's mind-blowingly awkward delivery of the sayonara line each week. "See ya later, decorator!" he nasally intoned, while each and every time doing a little head tilt and looking like he just farted. I'd fast forward through Whoopi hosting the Oscars to watch that! -- Drunken Bee

Best Network Haven For Washed-Up Actors
One might think Lifetime had a lock on this category, but it turns out that the Hallmark Channel has been quietly operating under the radar of everyone under the age of sixty-five, steadily building an empire of actors who we really, really thought had better things to do and enough money to not have to take whatever Hallmark was offering them. John Larroquette, Kellie Martin, Dick Van Dyke, Lea Thompson, and Valerie Bertinelli (okay, Bertinelli probably doesn't have anything better to do and needs the money) all have their own TV movie series in which they play detectives of some sort who solve sucky mysteries. Now that Hallmark has the rights to both Matlock and Murder, She Wrote, nursing-home employees across America are preparing themselves for the commotion that is sure to arise when a reunion crossover movie is announced. -- Sara M

Best Non-Starter Dance Craze On A Sports Show

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