Mondo Extra
2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

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2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

Best Reintroduction Of A Style That Used To Be Cool, But Now Makes Us Feel Dirty
Before Mad Men came along, sweater sets and narrow ties had a certain sense of bygone cool to them. You'd pop into a vintage store and come out with flouncy dresses that nipped in at the waist and made your boobs into torpedoes, or a man's suit that had lapels thinner than a thumbnail and pants that barely broke on top of your shoe. And you'd pull out these outfits of choice on some rare occasion when one of your friends wanted to go swing dancing or listen to jazz downtown, and you'd put on lipstick made from blood-red wax or slick your hair down with pomade and wear that oh-so-funky-yet-hip outfit out on the town and you'd feel GREAT. But now that Peter has waxed rhapsodic about gutting animals and innocent little Peggy has actually proven to be turned on by such declarations, now that Midge is banging Roger in hotel rooms during the afternoon and wiggling her ass in front of hidden rooms of ad execs, now that Betty is being ogled by a nine-year-old and then GIVING HIM HER HAIR AS A KEEPSAKE, well, we think we'll just retire those adorably retro outfits to the Salvation Army and let someone ELSE feel like a filthy little gutter-dweller, thank you very much. -- Erin

Best Superhero Satire
You can take your supposedly realistic comic-book "reboots" -- your Batman Beginses, for example -- and stick them in a sock. Realism in a superhero saga is: a hero who's being hassled by his sidekicks about their health insurance (and is kind of a dick); a villain who can't communicate his evil message to the public because he can't afford $20 billion for media buys, and instead has to settle for postcards (the dry hump of marketing strategies); and a sometime rival antagonist (brilliantly named "Antagone") with relative ant strength, the ability to hork up formic acid, and intermittent amnesia. If you haven't watched the first season of Adult Swim's Frisky Dingo, remedy that situation right now. Welcome To You're "Doom!" -- Wing Chun

The Best Way To Visit Europe Without Leaving Home Or Flipping On The Travel Channel Award
When mobster John Abruzzi was gunned down in Episode Four of Prison Break last fall, it meant more than just the departure of a beloved character or another notch in the show's impressive Season Two body count. It meant the end of the dialectical tour-de-force unleashed each week by actor Peter Stormare. Swedish by birth, the former Karl Hungus was asked by Prison Break producers to play an Italian crime boss. The result was an accent that was part Scandinavian, part Neapolitan, and all high comedy. The raspy, croaking accent seemed to change with Stormare's mood -- one week, we're in the Pyrenees, the next the Baltic states, and soon, some duchy or principality on the Mediterranean that has long since abandoned diplomatic relations with the U.S. When Stormare's Abruzzi died, it was like a part of us got shoved into a wood-chipper; we've never been able to look at a plate of spaghetti-and-Swedish-meatballs the same way again. -- Mr. Sobell

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Mondo Extra

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Mondo Extra
2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

You can take your supposedly realistic comic-book "reboots" -- your Batman Beginses, for example -- and stick them in a sock. Realism in a superhero saga is: a hero who's being hassled by his sidekicks about their health insurance (and is kind of a dick); a villain who can't communicate his evil message to the public because he can't afford $20 billion for media buys, and instead has to settle for postcards (the dry hump of marketing strategies); and a sometime rival antagonist (brilliantly named "Antagone") with relative ant strength, the ability to hork up formic acid, and intermittent amnesia. If you haven't watched the first season of Adult Swim's Frisky Dingo, remedy that situation right now. Welcome To You're "Doom!" -- Wing Chun

The Best Way To Visit Europe Without Leaving Home Or Flipping On The Travel Channel Award
When mobster John Abruzzi was gunned down in Episode Four of Prison Break last fall, it meant more than just the departure of a beloved character or another notch in the show's impressive Season Two body count. It meant the end of the dialectical tour-de-force unleashed each week by actor Peter Stormare. Swedish by birth, the former Karl Hungus was asked by Prison Break producers to play an Italian crime boss. The result was an accent that was part Scandinavian, part Neapolitan, and all high comedy. The raspy, croaking accent seemed to change with Stormare's mood -- one week, we're in the Pyrenees, the next the Baltic states, and soon, some duchy or principality on the Mediterranean that has long since abandoned diplomatic relations with the U.S. When Stormare's Abruzzi died, it was like a part of us got shoved into a wood-chipper; we've never been able to look at a plate of spaghetti-and-Swedish-meatballs the same way again. -- Mr. Sobell

The Better Business Bureau Is Taking A Nap Award
What would the world of "celebrity" "small businesses" be like without The Oxygen Network? Next time you're in California, be sure to take a gander at the Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency before you spend the night at Cheateau LaRue, Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott's bed and breakfast. With any luck, by the time of your visit The Bad Girls Club Nail Salon and Free Clinic will also be open for business. -- Potes

Biggest Suspension Of Disbelief
When she plays Betty Suarez on Ugly Betty, they can't quite make her really ugly. Unattractive, sure, with the hair, and the eyebrows, and the braces and glasses. We can even grant that the kind of people who work at a women's magazine would think her size 8 ass was "fat." But if we're supposed to think she has terrible fashion sense, maybe they should quit putting her in $400 Anna Sui dresses from Anthropologie. We're on to you, Pat Field! -- Wing Chun

The Clucking Hens Are Back In Vogue Award

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Mondo Extra

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