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2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

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2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

In "A Measure of Salvation," Adama and Roslin decided to deliberately infect the Cylons with a deadly virus. A few ships were out of range, but as a result the Cylons were reduced to a ragtag fleet of a few thousand freshly-pissed-off survivors. The rest of the season showed the characters grappling with the increasingly fuzzy lines between villains and victims. Oh, except that Helo intervened, so none of that happened. We got all that Sam-Starbuck-Apollo-Dualla stuff instead, right? Jesus. -- Strega

The It Means He Gets Results, You Stupid Chief Award For Outstanding Achievement In The Field Of Procedural Dramas
No one -- not even cranky Dr. House -- managed to flout more rules, cross more lines, and rack up as many ethics violations in the service of getting the job done than celebrity-lawyer-turned-prosecutor Sebastian Stark on CBS's latest "Take that, punk criminals!" drama, Shark. Need a jury tampered with? Shark's your man. Absolutely, positively need to get a confession from some perp under false pretenses? Shark will unleash a series of machinations that make the cons in The Sting look like the stuff of a children's book. It helps that James Woods attacks the title role with a particular panache. When most big-time movie actors deign to do a TV series, the "make sure my name is spelled right on the check" look on their faces is palpable -- Woods throws himself into the part with an enthusiasm that makes an otherwise pedestrian show a real hoot. -- Mr. Sobell

The Masterful Containment Of The Mayhem And Foolishness Of It All Award
Some actresses demonstrate their versatility by gaining a few pounds or putting on a latex schnozz so they can play someone all messed-up inside. Niecy Nash elected to shed the fat suit she wears as Reno 911's Deputy Raineesha Williams and play personal organizer to a variety of L.A.-area families who need to clean up their messy houses. As the hostess of Style Network's deceptively addictive Clean House, Nash bulldozes her way through cluttered living rooms, bullwhips reluctant people into letting go of their hideous belongings, and bullies the telegenic-and-competent Trish Suhr, Matt Iseman, and Mark Brunetz into throwing fabulous yard sales, fixing broken whatsits, and designing stylish yet livable rooms. And she does it all with a full face of flawless makeup and a flower in her hair. Fellow Style Network habitué Kimora Lee wishes she were half so fabulous as Miss Niecy. -- Sobell

Most Awesome Televised Nuclear Detonation

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Mondo Extra

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Mondo Extra
2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
2006-2007 Tubey Awards: Tubey Awards of Questionable Cachet

The Masterful Containment Of The Mayhem And Foolishness Of It All Award
Some actresses demonstrate their versatility by gaining a few pounds or putting on a latex schnozz so they can play someone all messed-up inside. Niecy Nash elected to shed the fat suit she wears as Reno 911's Deputy Raineesha Williams and play personal organizer to a variety of L.A.-area families who need to clean up their messy houses. As the hostess of Style Network's deceptively addictive Clean House, Nash bulldozes her way through cluttered living rooms, bullwhips reluctant people into letting go of their hideous belongings, and bullies the telegenic-and-competent Trish Suhr, Matt Iseman, and Mark Brunetz into throwing fabulous yard sales, fixing broken whatsits, and designing stylish yet livable rooms. And she does it all with a full face of flawless makeup and a flower in her hair. Fellow Style Network habitué Kimora Lee wishes she were half so fabulous as Miss Niecy. -- Sobell

Most Awesome Televised Nuclear Detonation
Yield:
24: 1 kiloton
Jericho: 20 kilotons
Advantage: Jericho.

Location
24: Valencia, CA
Jericho: Denver, CO; also Atlanta, GA (audio only)
Advantage: Depends where you live.

Time onscreen:
24: Several episodes
Jericho: Less than one act, despite being the most interesting character on the show
Advantage: 24.

Shock value:
24: Fair; Jack had killed Curtis only moments before, plus this wasn't even 24's first nuclear detonation on U.S. soil.
Jericho: Minimal, because it was kind of the whole premise of the show. It would have been more shocking to not have a nuclear explosion at all.

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