MONDO EXTRAS

Behind The Camera: The Unauthorized Story of Mork & Mindy

A quick shot of the ratings results reveals that Mork & Mindy has dropped to number twenty-six, just behind Soap and just ahead of Diff'rent Strokes. Garry and Harvey are on the phone with Frank. He tells them that he is definitely, absolutely, positively not worried about the ratings. And then he suggests fixing the show by sexing things up. Because what the world really wants to see is Robin Williams getting bizzay. After the call, Harvey wonders how he's supposed to make things sexier: "What am I supposed to do? Write a guest-starring role for Raquel Welch?" Aw, Harvey, haven't you learned -- don't speak in jest around Garry. He has no sense of irony.

Cut to Raquel Welch at a table read. She's playing an alien come to destroy the Earth. (And I think she reprised this character on Third Rock. Don't ask how I know that.) They finish the script, and she applauds like a little girl whose puppy just managed to go wee-wee on the paper. After everyone else leaves, Raquel leans in towards Harvey and puts her hand on his knee. She wants to suggest that the gorgeous woman he hired to appear as her lieutenant wear a dog mask. Whatever courage Harvey ever had is now lodged in his engorged penis, because he promises to think about it. And as she gets up to leave, she shoves her cleavage in his face and tells him that he has to make sure wardrobe favors her left breast. Yeah, because that one is really deformed.

Cut to the taping of a scene between Raquel and Robin. Mork is chained up in a sauna, and Raquel is wearing a shimmering blue body suit. If it's at all possible, the actress playing Raquel Welch is actually a far worse actor than Raquel Welch ever was. The scene is painful to watch, primarily because Robin can't stop with over-the-top completely unsubtle sex jokes. Isabel looks like she's going to wear her pencil down to a nubbin as she takes notes on all the things that will have to be cut. Speaking of cutting, the director cuts the scene in order to give Robin a chance to focus. Garry points out that "this jiggle is killing us." I think that what's killing you is having a star with the emotional adolescence of a twelve-year-old. Commercials.

A limo door opens and John Belushi falls onto his back on the sidewalk. He's wasted (obviously), and so is Robin, who soon climbs out of the limo on his own. They enter a run-down-looking bar.

Belushi is peeing in the bathroom while Robin talks to him from outside the door. Thankfully, we don't actually hear any pee sounds. Belushi has missed seeing Robin out, but Robin has had to cut back on his partying at clubs ever since he started getting mobbed by his fans. And yet he's still able to go shopping for those rainbow shirts, one of which he's wearing now. Belushi finishes peeing and washes his hands. It's always nice to see fat junkie comedians upholding the standards of hygiene. They walk out the bar, with Robin moaning and groaning about how awful his life is. We do learn that Robin just signed a deal to make Popeye -- he's very excited about it, because "Altman's a genius." Heh. Just then some fat drunk (I mean, a different fat drunk, not Belushi) staggers over to them and demands that Robin "do" Mork. What does that even mean? Were there people who really got a huge thrill out of hearing him say "shazbot" or "nanu nanu"? Belushi is as confused as I am -- he just puts his hand on the guy's face and shoves him away. Belushi notices what appear the only two other patrons in the bar -- a couple of hot women just looking to pick up fat drunks. He goes to talk to them to pick them up for him and Robin. And that is a four-way I just did not need to picture.

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Behind The Camera: The Unauthorized Story of Mork & Mindy

A quick shot of the ratings results reveals that Mork & Mindy has dropped to number twenty-six, just behind Soap and just ahead of Diff'rent Strokes. Garry and Harvey are on the phone with Frank. He tells them that he is definitely, absolutely, positively not worried about the ratings. And then he suggests fixing the show by sexing things up. Because what the world really wants to see is Robin Williams getting bizzay. After the call, Harvey wonders how he's supposed to make things sexier: "What am I supposed to do? Write a guest-starring role for Raquel Welch?" Aw, Harvey, haven't you learned -- don't speak in jest around Garry. He has no sense of irony.

Cut to Raquel Welch at a table read. She's playing an alien come to destroy the Earth. (And I think she reprised this character on Third Rock. Don't ask how I know that.) They finish the script, and she applauds like a little girl whose puppy just managed to go wee-wee on the paper. After everyone else leaves, Raquel leans in towards Harvey and puts her hand on his knee. She wants to suggest that the gorgeous woman he hired to appear as her lieutenant wear a dog mask. Whatever courage Harvey ever had is now lodged in his engorged penis, because he promises to think about it. And as she gets up to leave, she shoves her cleavage in his face and tells him that he has to make sure wardrobe favors her left breast. Yeah, because that one is really deformed.

Cut to the taping of a scene between Raquel and Robin. Mork is chained up in a sauna, and Raquel is wearing a shimmering blue body suit. If it's at all possible, the actress playing Raquel Welch is actually a far worse actor than Raquel Welch ever was. The scene is painful to watch, primarily because Robin can't stop with over-the-top completely unsubtle sex jokes. Isabel looks like she's going to wear her pencil down to a nubbin as she takes notes on all the things that will have to be cut. Speaking of cutting, the director cuts the scene in order to give Robin a chance to focus. Garry points out that "this jiggle is killing us." I think that what's killing you is having a star with the emotional adolescence of a twelve-year-old. Commercials.

A limo door opens and John Belushi falls onto his back on the sidewalk. He's wasted (obviously), and so is Robin, who soon climbs out of the limo on his own. They enter a run-down-looking bar.

Belushi is peeing in the bathroom while Robin talks to him from outside the door. Thankfully, we don't actually hear any pee sounds. Belushi has missed seeing Robin out, but Robin has had to cut back on his partying at clubs ever since he started getting mobbed by his fans. And yet he's still able to go shopping for those rainbow shirts, one of which he's wearing now. Belushi finishes peeing and washes his hands. It's always nice to see fat junkie comedians upholding the standards of hygiene. They walk out the bar, with Robin moaning and groaning about how awful his life is. We do learn that Robin just signed a deal to make Popeye -- he's very excited about it, because "Altman's a genius." Heh. Just then some fat drunk (I mean, a different fat drunk, not Belushi) staggers over to them and demands that Robin "do" Mork. What does that even mean? Were there people who really got a huge thrill out of hearing him say "shazbot" or "nanu nanu"? Belushi is as confused as I am -- he just puts his hand on the guy's face and shoves him away. Belushi notices what appear the only two other patrons in the bar -- a couple of hot women just looking to pick up fat drunks. He goes to talk to them to pick them up for him and Robin. And that is a four-way I just did not need to picture.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23Next

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Get the most of your experience.
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See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

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