MONDO EXTRAS

Feeling Minnesota

by Sars October 15, 2005
Beverly Hills, 90210: Pilot

First-day-of-school processing summit in the Omni. The twins discuss their experience -- it's weird not knowing anybody, people seemed to want to talk to them but then didn't, wah -- and Brandon asks if they're going to "hit this party." Totally, Brenda says, but she already made plans to go with Kelly and her friends -- does he want to come? No, Brandon's cool on his own.

Cut to the night of the party. Kelly and a Beemerful of friends pull up at the Walsh house, and Brenda comes out, accompanied by Cindy, which of course prompts a bunch of "oh my God, I would die" chittering in the car. Brenda is wearing that peach drop-waisted miscarriage from before, over white bike shorts, like, talk about "I would die." I made a lot of sartorial mistakes in the '90s, but I'm relieved to say the dress-over-bike-shorts thing wasn't one of them. ["My one triumph -- amid an ocean of failures as deep as it is wide -- is never having worn acid wash denim." -- Wing Chun] Moving on to the dickering-over-curfew portion of the scene, Cindy asks when Kelly has to be home, Kelly's all "in the what now?," Cindy opens with midnight, Donna bursts out laughing and Kelly smacks her, Brenda comes back with twelve-thirty, and Cindy settles for twelve-fifteen.

Establishing shot of the party house; why there are auto-lot searchlights in the back yard is never explained. Steve is bribing the valet to let him park the Vette himself, and Brandon walks up and compliments the car. "Well, you've gotta have something to live for, right?" Steve says. I...don't know what that means. Brandon shakes his rube thing, asking what the deal is with this girl and does she even have parents, and Steve continues in the non-sequitur vein with "Welcome to West Beverly High." Brandon hops in and they peel up the driveway.

Inside the party, we see the usual '80s-movie drunken shenanigans. We also see Steve's outfit: a tuxedo jacket over a white golf shirt, pleated khaki shorts, white socks, and sneakers. Ye gods. The camera tracks a cater-waiter on rollerblades, then stops on Kelly just as some rando tells her she's "looking good." She isn't; she's wearing a sleeveless drop-waisted mint-green pinafore that's almost as butt as Brenda's. Of course, then we have to hear about Kelly's nose job which she's really proud of some more, and then the girls spot Brandon and Steve standing near the pool, and Kelly thinks Brandon is cute, but is grossed out that he's with Steve. She expositions that they broke up but Steve is "having a tough time getting the message that it's O-V-E-R." Donna's hair, meanwhile, is having a tough time getting the message that she's not in J-E-R-S-E-Y, but at least she's not wearing a skin-tight Laura Ashloid micro-minidress like one of the other girls in the group.

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Feeling Minnesota

by Sars October 15, 2005
Beverly Hills, 90210: Pilot

First-day-of-school processing summit in the Omni. The twins discuss their experience -- it's weird not knowing anybody, people seemed to want to talk to them but then didn't, wah -- and Brandon asks if they're going to "hit this party." Totally, Brenda says, but she already made plans to go with Kelly and her friends -- does he want to come? No, Brandon's cool on his own.

Cut to the night of the party. Kelly and a Beemerful of friends pull up at the Walsh house, and Brenda comes out, accompanied by Cindy, which of course prompts a bunch of "oh my God, I would die" chittering in the car. Brenda is wearing that peach drop-waisted miscarriage from before, over white bike shorts, like, talk about "I would die." I made a lot of sartorial mistakes in the '90s, but I'm relieved to say the dress-over-bike-shorts thing wasn't one of them. ["My one triumph -- amid an ocean of failures as deep as it is wide -- is never having worn acid wash denim." -- Wing Chun] Moving on to the dickering-over-curfew portion of the scene, Cindy asks when Kelly has to be home, Kelly's all "in the what now?," Cindy opens with midnight, Donna bursts out laughing and Kelly smacks her, Brenda comes back with twelve-thirty, and Cindy settles for twelve-fifteen.

Establishing shot of the party house; why there are auto-lot searchlights in the back yard is never explained. Steve is bribing the valet to let him park the Vette himself, and Brandon walks up and compliments the car. "Well, you've gotta have something to live for, right?" Steve says. I...don't know what that means. Brandon shakes his rube thing, asking what the deal is with this girl and does she even have parents, and Steve continues in the non-sequitur vein with "Welcome to West Beverly High." Brandon hops in and they peel up the driveway.

Inside the party, we see the usual '80s-movie drunken shenanigans. We also see Steve's outfit: a tuxedo jacket over a white golf shirt, pleated khaki shorts, white socks, and sneakers. Ye gods. The camera tracks a cater-waiter on rollerblades, then stops on Kelly just as some rando tells her she's "looking good." She isn't; she's wearing a sleeveless drop-waisted mint-green pinafore that's almost as butt as Brenda's. Of course, then we have to hear about Kelly's nose job which she's really proud of some more, and then the girls spot Brandon and Steve standing near the pool, and Kelly thinks Brandon is cute, but is grossed out that he's with Steve. She expositions that they broke up but Steve is "having a tough time getting the message that it's O-V-E-R." Donna's hair, meanwhile, is having a tough time getting the message that she's not in J-E-R-S-E-Y, but at least she's not wearing a skin-tight Laura Ashloid micro-minidress like one of the other girls in the group.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25Next

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