MONDO EXTRAS

Dynasty: The Making of a Guilty Pleasure

by Jessica January 12, 2005
Dynasty: The Making of a Guilty Pleasure

On set, Joan is making out with "Cecil Colby," who is old and gross and Blake's big business rival and the uncle of Blake's son-in-law Jeff, who happens to be married to Alexis's daughter, Fallon. ["Who also, at many points, made out with old, gross Cecil Colby. Fallon was a delicious little ho in her early days. I miss her." -- Heathen] Jeff and Fallon both ruled, and neither one of them is featured in this movie. At the very least, I would have liked to have relived the scene in which Fallon decides she's going to abort Jeff's baby, and Blake is all, "Jeff, where is Fallon?" and Jeff is all, "At the hospital," and Blake is all, "Huh?" and Jeff goes, "Call them. Try THE ABORTION DESK," and Blake goes, "THE ABORTION DESK?" and that's why it's really important that we preserve the right to choose in this country: for lines like that. Anyway, Joan is not happy about having to make out with Old Creepy Cecil, and sort of storms off to her dressing room to wipe her mouth. When she's gone, the actor playing Cecil tells Les -- see, another scene in which Les is involved, but isn't seen until someone has to have someone to bounce something off of; poor Les -- that he just bought a new house and he wants to make sure he's not going to get blown up or pushed down an elevator shaft or stabbed or tossed off a balcony. Les assures him that everything is copasetic. Clearly, Les hasn't yet read the script in which Cecil has a heart attack while having sex with Alexis, after which he gets coerced into marrying her on his death bed so that Alexis can run his big oil company and make all kinds of trouble for everyone. So Les is quite surprised when he goes into Esther's office and she tells him that they have to find Alexis a hunkier love interest.

Season 4. Joan is auditioning "hunky" leading men by sticking her tongue down their throats. I thought the incomparable Dex Dexter appeared earlier than Season 4, but I could definitely be wrong. When you watch something on SoapNet, it's tough to keep seasons differentiated in your head. I am not wrong, however, about the fact that the actor they cast to play Michael Nader -- who played Dex -- is simply terrible, and doesn't even attempt to ape Nader's very distinctive speech patterns and comes nowhere near Nader's total awesomeness in this extremely awesome part. Instead, it is implied that Nader is cast because he's a pretty-boy with whom Joan likes to make out, and while that may in fact have been true, it doesn't address the fact that he was really very, very good in the role. Michael Nader was also very good as Dimitri on All My Children, but I think he's a total drug addict or something very unfortunate now, which is a shame, because he is really a fantastic soap actor. Anyway.

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Dynasty: The Making of a Guilty Pleasure

by Jessica January 12, 2005
Dynasty: The Making of a Guilty Pleasure

On set, Joan is making out with "Cecil Colby," who is old and gross and Blake's big business rival and the uncle of Blake's son-in-law Jeff, who happens to be married to Alexis's daughter, Fallon. ["Who also, at many points, made out with old, gross Cecil Colby. Fallon was a delicious little ho in her early days. I miss her." -- Heathen] Jeff and Fallon both ruled, and neither one of them is featured in this movie. At the very least, I would have liked to have relived the scene in which Fallon decides she's going to abort Jeff's baby, and Blake is all, "Jeff, where is Fallon?" and Jeff is all, "At the hospital," and Blake is all, "Huh?" and Jeff goes, "Call them. Try THE ABORTION DESK," and Blake goes, "THE ABORTION DESK?" and that's why it's really important that we preserve the right to choose in this country: for lines like that. Anyway, Joan is not happy about having to make out with Old Creepy Cecil, and sort of storms off to her dressing room to wipe her mouth. When she's gone, the actor playing Cecil tells Les -- see, another scene in which Les is involved, but isn't seen until someone has to have someone to bounce something off of; poor Les -- that he just bought a new house and he wants to make sure he's not going to get blown up or pushed down an elevator shaft or stabbed or tossed off a balcony. Les assures him that everything is copasetic. Clearly, Les hasn't yet read the script in which Cecil has a heart attack while having sex with Alexis, after which he gets coerced into marrying her on his death bed so that Alexis can run his big oil company and make all kinds of trouble for everyone. So Les is quite surprised when he goes into Esther's office and she tells him that they have to find Alexis a hunkier love interest.

Season 4. Joan is auditioning "hunky" leading men by sticking her tongue down their throats. I thought the incomparable Dex Dexter appeared earlier than Season 4, but I could definitely be wrong. When you watch something on SoapNet, it's tough to keep seasons differentiated in your head. I am not wrong, however, about the fact that the actor they cast to play Michael Nader -- who played Dex -- is simply terrible, and doesn't even attempt to ape Nader's very distinctive speech patterns and comes nowhere near Nader's total awesomeness in this extremely awesome part. Instead, it is implied that Nader is cast because he's a pretty-boy with whom Joan likes to make out, and while that may in fact have been true, it doesn't address the fact that he was really very, very good in the role. Michael Nader was also very good as Dimitri on All My Children, but I think he's a total drug addict or something very unfortunate now, which is a shame, because he is really a fantastic soap actor. Anyway.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27Next

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