Sweet Home Alabama

by Angel Cohn September 27, 2011
Fall Pilot Season: Hart of Dixie

Back on the bus, present day Zoe is being grossed out by her seatmates Cheeto habit. She is missing the big picture, which is that the Cheetos are going to keep her in business for a very long time. In fact, while she's so gung-ho about New York being awesome, she should move somewhere where people eat bacon for every meal. It would be much more profitable for a cardiothoracic surgeon. So we flash back to recent history in the Big Apple, where she got dumped by her boyfriend because she was surgery obsessed (even though that's his job too) and didn't get the fellowship because she's a stone-cold bitch. Or at the very least lacks bedside manner. So she's fired, and told to go be a GP (which she finds demeaning) for a year, and she only wants to be a specialist and those jobs are hard to come by in New York. Her boss advises her to expand her horizons, hence her getting on a bus to South. She calls her dad for some comfort, saying that she didn't get the fellowship (is there a cool ring and Smeagol involved?) but she's going to get back on track and be his new partner. Turns out, he's a ball-buster who won't just give his kid a job... and he hangs up on her.

She had been getting postcards from Harley, she thinks it is because her speech was inspiring... but let's be real here, he's obviously got a connection to her that she's not picking up on. For a smart girl, she's really dumb.

She gets dumped off three miles from Bluebell and has to walk, in Louboutins, in dusty weather. Until she's picked up by a dreamy Scott Porter who informs her that he's an attorney not an ax murderer. I bet that's what all the ax-murderers say. He surprises her by saying he worked at some swanky law firm in New York, before he returned home. She says this is her purgatory. George says neighbors take care of each other and there are lots of parades. Real selling point there. As they drive into town, they see a gaggle of women dressed in full pastel gowns and carrying parasols. Quaint?

She heads straight to Harley's medical practice where she's unceremoniously told that he's been dead for four months. When she reveals that she's Zoe, the secretary gets all excited saying that Harley left her his practice. Zoe looks gobsmacked.

Zoe goes for lunch, and then throws away perfectly good fried catfish. It's no wonder she's so skinny. Zoe thinks patients are just going to flock to her, but she's quickly informed that Brick Breeland owns the other half of the practice and he's not exactly what you'd call easy to get along with. She wants to explain to Dr. Brick that she's only here for a year and then the practice that he so covets is entirely his, but Brick's out hunting and is not to be interrupted. While strolling through the park (that eerily looks like Stars Hollow) they see a bunch of young women in hoop skirts dancing an antiquated dance. The Belles are a custom of the town, and they wield a lot of authority and they are the towns resident mean girls in cupcake clothing. The most lemon sherbet looking one, Jaime King, comes over to greet the "lady doctor". Turns out her name is actually Lemon, and that she's Brick's daughter. Zoe asks Lemon if she can reach her dad, but Lemon says Brick aka "Daddy" knows she's here. Then she tells Zoe if she knows what's good for her she'll get out of town before he gets home. What a warm Southern welcome. Zoe's response? "You tell 'Daddy' that if my medical career hasn't been killed by my mother, or the chief of surgery at New York Hospital, it most certainly won't be by some Southern xenophobe dressed up like a stick of butter." New York Hospital? Way to be specific. Is that next to the fake college Felicity went to? Then Zoe dispatches Mrs. H to get her a soy latte, even though that's a 22 mile trip. She's quite bitchy and self-important about it. How rude.

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