MONDO EXTRAS

Gimme Shelter

by Jacob Clifton May 24, 2004
Helter Skelter

At the police station, we learn that the young man who called Charles Manson "Chuck" is named Joey. All Joey will tell them is his rap sheet, his "beefs," and the two original cops say that he will get off on all of these "beefs" if he turns over. Joey offers to tell them a little bit about blond guy with no ear, even though that isn't their case. At this point I think they just want to stick it to the other cop. There's relevant flashbackage as Joey says that Charlie told him he cut off blond guy's ear with a sword, and we see Charlie cut off the guy's ear. With a sword. The cops are eating it up. Next he asks if anybody ever "got their fridge wrote on." He tells them there was a fridge got wrote on in blood, and something about "PIGS" or something. We see someone writing on a refrigerator in blood, and writing on the wall something about "PIGS." I guess all this is in case we are disinclined to believe Joey's veracity, even though we were there. I'm guessing the cops can't see the same flashbacks we're seeing, as they're lucky enough not to be watching this.

The cops, tired of all this foreplay, ask about the Tate murders. He doesn't remember the dates, because there aren't any calendars or clocks (Sign #6 that you are in a cult), but he does remember it would have been about two weeks before his arrest. A bunch of people left the Movie Ranch under cover of night, and he remembers Charlie making word noises about "we knocked off five pigs last night." When Manson says "pigs," also, he doesn't mean police, he means "people with more money than Charles Manson." There's a documentary-style flashback to Charles Manson speaking directly into the camera and saying the words silently along with Joey in the here and now. It's so stupid and fourth-wall, because apparently Joey sees life in a documentary style. It's all directing that's the problem here, because the acting is pretty good for the most part, or at least cool, and the hair is no one's fault, but the ridiculous postmodern Natural Born Killers every-style-at-once thing is really ham-fisted. Everybody stares at each other for five minutes of my life. Seriously.

At the Ladies' Jail, the deeply crazy and awesome one is sleeping soundly, while her hardened bunkmate smokes and stares and shakes because of how awesomely crazy Sadie is. A female hack comes to get her and leads her from the room, I assume in order to give a statement, but we don't see that or anything; we just jump to a press conference that is hyperactively multimedia, where we're told that the arrests for the Tate murders have been made: case solved. The pinched number three: Tex, Katie, and Fresh Meat, who is actually missing. There will probably be two other people indicted. They think this group is also the people that killed those Boring HITG people. Nobody really cares.

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Gimme Shelter

by Jacob Clifton May 24, 2004
Helter Skelter Roman Polanski, who we've seen once -- and that only in 89 percent darkness -- feels some emotional emotions in the house where his wife or whatever, who we saw maybe three times, was brutally killed, which we thankfully did not see. Then there's a stupid montage of not very good actors playing candid reports, people on the street giving opinions, all of which contradict but basically amount to the fact that being a movie star is pretty much asking to be chopped up by apocalypse cults due to their use of sex, drugs, and airline stewardesses and general acting the part of trash. The whole thing where it spins out of control, and all of sudden instead of a couple of artsy friends it was this huge party full of freaks and weirdos and who knows what. Sex and drugs and stewardesses, for a start. Roman gives a press conference and feels some emotions. Charles Manson has gone even weirder and now he's got this map that spans multiple huge pieces of paper about where exactly they are going in the desert and half of the geography is made up from his pointy head and it's all drawn in crazy crayon and the "bottomless pit" might be underwater and one of the cult guys is like, "Water? In the desert?" And doesn't back off from the obvious rage blossom blooming behind Charles Manson's eyes, ending with basically a "Whatever, Chuck." Oops. So Charles Manson is like, "Do I look like a Chuck to you?" And I'm like, no, you look like a chucker to me, and the guy's like, "No sir you do not look like a Chuck to me sir," and then Charles Manson is like, "I died on the cross for you," and I roll my eyes, because are you just going to keep throwing that in my face every time we have an argument, forever? Just then the egg timer or whatever Pregnant Souffle-Haired Lady uses instead of her God-given free will goes off, so she comes running up to tell him Fresh Meat's gone. So I guess Fresh Meat just abandoned her kid to the cult? I wish I could say I expected better. Charles Manson says that eventually she'll come back for Tanya, and "then we'll make her come to now." Which means kill her ass, by the way. I don't know if I mentioned that before. All the hippies are sleeping and then there are cop cars and helicopters and more mid-nineties dance music and the SWAT team and arrests left and right and hippies in their underwear getting hauled off to creepy cult jail. They are all under arrest for stealing cars and dune buggies and firearms. The ladies just smile and laugh because it's all so funny and awesome. In the courtroom for the arraignment, there's moderate pandemonium because the hippies can't keep still and creep and dance around. Then the judge dismisses the case because of a technicality involving the search warrant. The hippies hoot and holler and ululate. The great thing about a cult is they're tenacious: they tally up all the stuff the cops didn't get away with and start remaking their plans to get out into the desert. Squeaky turns up -- she hasn't been around at all since the beginning, which I'm sad about. Sadder still am I about the fact that Fresh Meat has totally called the Manson Family from a payphone in Taos, where she has located her ex-husband. Why are you calling them, stupid? Faerie Queen is like, "I can't believe you left Tanya," and then tells her that all the kids were put in Social Services during the raid. Now part of the ever-changing plan is that they are going to burn down any machines in the desert that may have been put there to confuse the Manson Family. This Free Pass thing is turning my brain inside out: historically, did Charles Manson make this little sense, or is the story just being told weirdly?

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