MONDO EXTRAS

Gimme Shelter

by Jacob Clifton May 24, 2004
Helter Skelter

This is Anna's second-favorite part of the movie: As the mysterious girl I can't place thinks hard about how to get her buzzkill dad out of the picture, Sadie and some other cult girl dance by, singing the song from the shower scene about how "the illusion has just been a dream," which is dumb, so I'm sure it's a Charles Manson song. She smiles joyfully and hops up to join them, and they go skipping off down the hallway and giggle-singing. It's awesome. Dad's like, WTF?

Arraignment: Charles Manson looks...I hate to say it, but...a little bit crazy when they bring him in to the courtroom. The defense moves to postpone so that they can enter a plea. Why didn't they do this some other time? I don't know anything, so maybe that's when you do it, but that hardly seems efficient, to get everybody in the whole world in the courtroom so you can say, "Can we meet back here in a couple of weeks?" The prosecution has no problem with that, because as Bugsy's friend's says, "We need all the time we can get." How come? These people are total Corn-Nuts, a one-year-old child could pick Charles Manson out of a lineup as "the crazy one" with only a little prompting, and Sadie would probably confess to stealing and eating the Lindbergh baby if she thought your jaw would drop.

Bugsy's watch has stopped, and he's like, "Weird." He looks over at Manson, who glints intensely at him as if to say, "I made your watch stop with my evil mind powers." Say it with me, ya'll: I'm so sure, Charles Manson! How affected can you get?

Then Charles Manson stands up and delivers some word-noises about firing his attorney because he'll defend himself for free, whereas his public defender is getting paid (albeit in beads and shiny pieces of scrap metal), and thus has a conflict of interest. Which is only true if you live in Mansonworld where money is evil, or something. "Interesting," says the judge, cracking me up. I love the lack of tolerance "the Man" shows for Manson's crazy ass, even though it only feeds his multiplex. All of the people in the "straight" world get a huge kick out of Manson's further word-noises about defending himself. The judge openly questions his competence and tells him it's a huge mistake. He says huge like "nyoodge," same as Trump. I'm totally saying it that way from now on. All the Mansons including Charlie giggle about that, how it's a nyoodge mistake for him to defend himself, like, "He's totally Jesus, dude. As in Christ. He's seen four episodes of Perry Mason and spent seventeen years in jail, locked away from the outside world, learning no trade or skill. What is a fancy law degree compared to that?" Manson makes word-noises that John Gray, Screenwriter thinks sound very litigious. I don't know when it happened, by the way, but is it weird that I've decided in the last two hours that the Spanking the Monkey kid has gotten kind of hot? Maybe it's just the hair and beard hiding whatever is not hot. He could have a third and fourth nipple or a giraffe coming out of his chin and we'd never know with all that gross hair all over.

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Gimme Shelter

by Jacob Clifton May 24, 2004
Helter Skelter We have audio, sadly: Tex talks in that creepy slowed-down crunk low voice and tells cute little giggling Sadie to go inside and write something. He should have mentioned at some point how you spell "Helter Skelter," but I get that they have a lot of work to do and not a lot of time to do it in. Stooping to soak up some of Sharon Tate's blood with a kitchen towel for use as a writing instrument, she lies down next to her still-moving corpse like Nicole Kidman in The Hours with that bird. No, be honest, it's more like Madonna on her mother's grave in Truth Or Dare. Sharon whispers to Sadie to "take the baby." Oh jeez, because before Sadie told Bunkmate that this was a long story. So I guess we'll see. Sadie appears to consider it, because she does like cutting and stabbing and blood, but almost apologetically quickly says, "I can't," and then jumps up to go write all over the place in Sharon's blood. So, not such a long story, really. But maybe in her unicorn mind she had a really long conversation with Glomer about it and they decided it was a bad idea, and it was the complexity of Glomer's reasoning that would have taken too long to tell Bunkmate. Sadie smirks deliciously yet calmly yet crazily as Bugsy recounts the numbers of shootings and stabbings for each artsy dead person. That lady from L.A. Law that is Fresh Meat's mom drops her off somewhere -- oh, it's the police station. Some yodeling opera stuff starts happening that is very Twin Peaks as she waves goodbye to L.A. Law lady. Fresh Meat, you are an utter fuckup as a POV character: we lost track of you for a year, and we fell dangerously in love with Sadie, and now you've made this decision to turn yourself over to the cops without telling us why or showing us how. Charles Manson, in extreme close-up, with just a band of light across his eyes, points out to his jailer that the maximum sentence for arson and dune buggy theft is relatively negligible. There's kind of a cool segue to Sadie's eyes, which are in roughly the same screen-position, to show that he inhabits her brain and/or is her personal savior and/or can see and hear everything she says, does or thinks. Bugsy asks her to hearsay her way through the events of the second round of Boring HITG murders, for which she was not present because she stayed outside, and she gleefully flashes back to someone else's memories. Keep in mind that there's a judge present, who says nothing about this. I'm not going to complain, though, because I'd rather have Sadie tell me this story than anyone else. I would rather hear Sadie describe any given episode of ER to me than watch it myself, she's that awesome.

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