Already happy about the postponement, the DA shoots his wad over this one. Manson stares creepily at him for a few minutes, and then his spidery hands reach down for a glass of water. "Your hands are shaking, Charlie. Are you scared of me?" Bugsy sits down, and Charles Manson makes a multitude of faces, almost crying, then praying, and finally going blank. He allows as how Bugsy seems pretty fair, and Bugsy agrees that he wants to give Manson a fair trial. It's all so humane and polite, I get really, really tense. Bugsy says he's looking forward to cross-examining Charles Manson on the stand (although I'm more interested in the defense's questioning at that point: "I'm Jesus, right? As in Christ?" "Yes, I am.") because he's curious about a lot of stuff, like where Charles Manson got the idea that other people don't always want to live. Charles Manson makes three more faces, but they all say the same thing: "Where am I again?"
That same garage-rock cover of "Helter Skelter" from the opening comes back -- it sounds like someone's cousin or teenage son's band, probably John Gray's -- and there's a montage of "Free Manson" paraphernalia (can you still get that? I think it would make good gifts for, like, my grandmother). All the magazine covers and Manson merchandise have the Monkeyspanker's face Photoshopped in, like even the famous eye-bulging LIFE cover, all of which is relaxing. I didn't want to deal with Manson's actual face after all this. Some hippie dude soundbites that he "fell in love with Charlie Manson the first time [he] saw his cherub face and sparkling eyes on TV." Whatever, dude. A little of that Sensitive New Age Hippie-Man poetry crap goes a long way.
Some blonde flower child trust fund chick who can't act bitches that Charles Manson is "the death of the hippie," because even though they aren't members of the Manson Family, they still are discriminated against as hippies. Sweetheart, I'll tell you what I told those black trench coat kids a few years ago: I hate to burst your bubble, but everybody already hated you even before anything happened. Don't kid yourself. Manson rebuts this young lady from his cell by yelling word-noises about how he hates hippies. Case in point, babe: even Charles Manson looks down on your ass. This guy is such a good impersonator of Charles Manson! Again, I can't decide if that makes him a good actor, and I know I'm stuck on this, but I think I already thought he was a good actor, so this is unrelated, like finding out he's best friends with Lemony Snicket and speaks Japanese and can play the banjo with his feet, all at the same time.
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"And then they bring in a thing with a perforated colon..." "A human being?" "Yes, with a perforated colon. And the thing that has been pregnant for forty-seven years and never does anything..." "Sherry Stringfield?" "That is the thing I mean, yes. She was still pregnant, and then she fought with the round red-headed thing some more about something silly and it was like that episode of Things
where the pregnant thing that's with Tyler Durden fought with the flaky blonde thing that only ever acts like one thing in every movie."
I feel WHOMPs coming...there they are. Katie and Leslie, who I can't positively say I've seen before, although I remember there were three women there counting Sadie, throw Mrs. Boring on the bed. WHOMP: Tex rips open Mr. Boring's shirt in a very Oz
way. WHOMP: The ladies clonk Mrs. Boring on the head for awhile with a big heavy lamp. WHOMP: Tex manhandles Mr. Boring's exposed abdomen and chest in a very Oz
way. WHOMP: Everybody falls off the bed. WHOMP: Tex comes in to see what the trouble is and helps pick everybody up off the floor. WHOMP: Mr. Boring bleeds on the living room floor. The Mansons soak up some of his blood and decide not to get too creative, writing more nonsense phrases ending in the word "Pig" on the walls. Creepy shower with all three of them under the faucet, singing. That negative effect which seems to signify that a multiple homicide has just taken place. Why have a special effect just for that? Especially if we've just seen the murders themselves? After their shower, the three of them feed the dogs and make some snacks for themselves. They're so hungry after all that stabbing and cutting and choking and bludgeoning, the poor dears. Tex is carrying what looks like a bag of blood, but I think is their bloody clothes, as they leave.
Sadie explains that Helter Skelter is "the last war on the face of the earth...all the wars that have ever been fought, built one on top of the other. Something no man can conceive of in his imagination." You must admit that Charles Manson has an ear for rhetoric when he's not phoning it in with shit like "No sense makes sense." Sadie yawns like an adorable kitty cat as Bugsy relates that Mr. Boring has some number of stab wounds and Mrs. Boring had some other number of stab wounds. She smiles beatifically at Bugsy, and even he is a little creeped out.
Bugsy tells the reporters that the following indictments have resulted from the Grand Jury: Charlie, Tex, Katie, Sadie, and Fresh Meat get seven murder "beefs" and one conspiracy to commit murder "beefs" each. Leslie Van Houten, in recognition of the fact that she isn't memorable and wasn't at the Tate house, gets two murder "beefs" and one conspiracy to commit "beef." Some girl who looks a little like Natasha Gregson Wagner -- is this Leslie? It might be Katie. Who cares? Where's Sadie
? -- meets her dad through that jail glass. I like how each of them has a separate but equal madness: when they were all in one Movie Ranch together they all acted the same, but now that the system has divided the Family, each is weird in their own way. I love Sadie, but I think it would get boring if they all acted like her, plus none of them would get away with it like her. This lady is very stare-y, and seems kind of pissy in that schizophrenic way where maybe she's just being really intense but coming off bitchy. She makes her dad cry with her disinterest and lack of moral self-critique. She and I roll our eyes as he wonders aloud whether he demonstrated enough love for her, and where did he go wrong, and blah blah blah. It's not about you, Dad. It's about my boyfriend Jesus (as in Christ), and it's about race riots, and making sure the dogs get fed. Your parents must have put some kind of ego in you
, boy. Yikes.
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