MONDO EXTRAS

We're All In This Together. All Right

by Miss Alli August 17, 2007
High School Musical

Next: a series of bad auditions. The first girl has a bow in her hair, which seems a bit unlikely, since even nerds know they're at a high school, not a dog show. The next guy is a stiff dressed like a library who has the words written on his hand. Dismissed! Next girl: tuneless. Next girl: operatic. Next guy: ballet dancer, HA HA HA! Who ever heard of that? A boy ballerina! Next couple: interpretive dancers. It turns out that Troy has been watching all these auditions from behind the mops and brooms of his self-loathing, and Gabi manages to sneak up behind and surprise him. She asks if he's auditioning, but he insists that he isn't. They discuss the hiding, and she immediately diagnoses him with a fear of making the other dudes think he's...you know. Soft. They watch as another girl can't choke out any words during her audition. Troy and Gabi discuss their fear of subjecting themselves to the DQ and her acid tongue, because they have this in common, this fear and this insecurity, and I don't know about you, but I think there is some chance that it will ultimately bind them to each other.

So the only people auditioning for the leads are Sharpay and Ryan, and don't get me started on how creepy it is for a brother and sister to play leads opposite each other all the time, yuck, ew, yuck. Troy and Gabi sink into chairs in the back of the room as Sharpay and Ryan prepare for their empty exercise of an audition. They blow off the accompanist/composer and prepare to work alone with the assistance of their boom box or what have you. They go through their pre-performance preparations, which include a little finger-waving, breathing-out exercise that isn't as funny as it should have been. That could be done better. Their audition is predictably goober-y and saccharine, and the accompanist crinkles her nose at what they're doing to her sensitive love ballad, since now it sounds like the theme song from a 1987 series from Miller-Boyett Productions. When they're done, the DQ asks if there are any last-minute additions to the audition list, and Ryan starts scooting people from the room. The accompanist weakly protests to Sharpay that they ruined her song, but Sharpay is not having it. Not! Having! It! Sharpay smacks the dork around, telling her that she's in no position to direct great performers. After the DQ calls for last-minute auditioners once more, and when she hears nothing, she declares "done" and turns out the light.

As she's leaving, Gabi hops out and says she wants to audition, and Troy extravagantly mugs, acting the emotion of "shock" with slightly less subtlety than Jodie Sweetin used to. But the DQ says that auditions are over. Single auditions ended long ago, and "there are simply no other pairs." "I'll sing with her," comes Troy's weak voice. The DQ is shocked that he is here without his "sports posse," as she puts it. The DQ continues to insist that it's too late, but Troy advocates for Gabi's "amazing voice." As the DQ is leaving, the nerd accompanist drops all her stuff and throws her sheet music all over the stage. You know who's clumsy? Musicians. Troy and Gabi run up to help. Clearly, she's a bit gobsmacked to have the one and only Troy Bolton helping her clean up her stuff. He even pulls her to her feet, then he asks her why she's scared of Ryan and Sharpay. The composer, whose name is Kelsi, takes pleasure in Troy's reassurances that she's the real star, and she wants him to hear how the song is meant to be. Hey, great idea! But who will sing it? Who? Who? Troy and Gabi walk to the piano. And, of course, in perfect harmony, they sing the duet. Not corny and shitty like Sharpay and Ryan did, but corny and shitty in a totally new way. Specifically, Gabi performs the entire thing while staring moonily at nothing. At least Efron is moving his eyeballs around. Speaking of getting your head in the game: Wake up, Hudgens. Have some coffee. Have a Red Bull. You will not be shocked to hear that the DQ has surreptitiously been listening, and she offers them a callback, instructing Kelsi to work with them on another song. Troy looks at the sheet music in horror, wondering what he's gotten himself into. Theater, that's what!

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Comments

We're All In This Together. All Right

by Miss Alli August 17, 2007
High School Musical

Next: a series of bad auditions. The first girl has a bow in her hair, which seems a bit unlikely, since even nerds know they're at a high school, not a dog show. The next guy is a stiff dressed like a library who has the words written on his hand. Dismissed! Next girl: tuneless. Next girl: operatic. Next guy: ballet dancer, HA HA HA! Who ever heard of that? A boy ballerina! Next couple: interpretive dancers. It turns out that Troy has been watching all these auditions from behind the mops and brooms of his self-loathing, and Gabi manages to sneak up behind and surprise him. She asks if he's auditioning, but he insists that he isn't. They discuss the hiding, and she immediately diagnoses him with a fear of making the other dudes think he's...you know. Soft. They watch as another girl can't choke out any words during her audition. Troy and Gabi discuss their fear of subjecting themselves to the DQ and her acid tongue, because they have this in common, this fear and this insecurity, and I don't know about you, but I think there is some chance that it will ultimately bind them to each other.

So the only people auditioning for the leads are Sharpay and Ryan, and don't get me started on how creepy it is for a brother and sister to play leads opposite each other all the time, yuck, ew, yuck. Troy and Gabi sink into chairs in the back of the room as Sharpay and Ryan prepare for their empty exercise of an audition. They blow off the accompanist/composer and prepare to work alone with the assistance of their boom box or what have you. They go through their pre-performance preparations, which include a little finger-waving, breathing-out exercise that isn't as funny as it should have been. That could be done better. Their audition is predictably goober-y and saccharine, and the accompanist crinkles her nose at what they're doing to her sensitive love ballad, since now it sounds like the theme song from a 1987 series from Miller-Boyett Productions. When they're done, the DQ asks if there are any last-minute additions to the audition list, and Ryan starts scooting people from the room. The accompanist weakly protests to Sharpay that they ruined her song, but Sharpay is not having it. Not! Having! It! Sharpay smacks the dork around, telling her that she's in no position to direct great performers. After the DQ calls for last-minute auditioners once more, and when she hears nothing, she declares "done" and turns out the light.

As she's leaving, Gabi hops out and says she wants to audition, and Troy extravagantly mugs, acting the emotion of "shock" with slightly less subtlety than Jodie Sweetin used to. But the DQ says that auditions are over. Single auditions ended long ago, and "there are simply no other pairs." "I'll sing with her," comes Troy's weak voice. The DQ is shocked that he is here without his "sports posse," as she puts it. The DQ continues to insist that it's too late, but Troy advocates for Gabi's "amazing voice." As the DQ is leaving, the nerd accompanist drops all her stuff and throws her sheet music all over the stage. You know who's clumsy? Musicians. Troy and Gabi run up to help. Clearly, she's a bit gobsmacked to have the one and only Troy Bolton helping her clean up her stuff. He even pulls her to her feet, then he asks her why she's scared of Ryan and Sharpay. The composer, whose name is Kelsi, takes pleasure in Troy's reassurances that she's the real star, and she wants him to hear how the song is meant to be. Hey, great idea! But who will sing it? Who? Who? Troy and Gabi walk to the piano. And, of course, in perfect harmony, they sing the duet. Not corny and shitty like Sharpay and Ryan did, but corny and shitty in a totally new way. Specifically, Gabi performs the entire thing while staring moonily at nothing. At least Efron is moving his eyeballs around. Speaking of getting your head in the game: Wake up, Hudgens. Have some coffee. Have a Red Bull. You will not be shocked to hear that the DQ has surreptitiously been listening, and she offers them a callback, instructing Kelsi to work with them on another song. Troy looks at the sheet music in horror, wondering what he's gotten himself into. Theater, that's what!

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See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

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