MONDO EXTRAS

Little House On The Prairie: Whisper Country

We open in Town, also known as That One Stretch Of Sand That All The Buildings Face. We are staring at the front of the Innumerable Dead Walnut Grove Residents Memorial School, Church, and Typhus Hospital, with its lovely flag flying out front. The title card reads "Whisper Country." And not, as the DVD box says, "Whisper County." (Way to go, high-end DVD producers.) Come to think of it, I'm not sure I know why this episode is named "Whisper Country" at all, unless the idea is that the entire episode whispers, "Bad, bad... ." A wagon rumbles across the foreground in a picturesque fashion, then a crop of children comes running out of the school. As children generally do in this town, they are running very quickly, as if they know their life expectancy is teeny, and at any time, one could be attacked by rabid bats, die, be mourned, and have their parents taught how to move on, all in one episode. At the front of the pack of children is Mary "Middle Distance" Ingalls, who is not yet staring into the middle distance (she will be staring into the middle distance by the end of the season, though). She's dashing down the dirty road, and it turns out that the picturesque wagon contained Ma and Pa Ingalls (I'm very unobservant), because now, Mary is catching up with them. "Ma! Pa!" she is yelling. While she's still running toward the wagon, she hollers that she has "a job! A teaching job!" You can consider that little redundancy an example of the way the show constantly throws in those "really I am" and "but Pa!" word clusters that don't mean anything.

We cut rather abruptly to the Ingalls Fireside Contemplation Den And Nutritious Stewhouse, where Reverend Alden is sitting at the table, explaining that Eva "I Say 'School,' You Say 'Marm,' 'School!' 'Marm!' 'School!' 'Marm!'" Beadle has named Mary the most qualified student for an available teaching position. IN HELL. A shy Mary sits at the table with Ma while Pa prattles around tending the fire and trimming the hair on his chest into little topiaries. Look, a giraffe! Mary looks, to be honest, like she's hot for Reverend Alden, which is just another reason why Melissa Sue Anderson hopefully learned typing or plumbing or some other marketable skill along the way. I don't think "okay, now throw your best come-hither to the reverend" can possibly have been the acting direction she was given. Reverend Alden explains that the school is Willow Prairie's first, and that Mary will make fifteen dollars a month. I don't know how long this job is supposed to last, but I hope she doesn't spend all her money on books or visual art. You know, all things considered.

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Little House On The Prairie: Whisper Country

We open in Town, also known as That One Stretch Of Sand That All The Buildings Face. We are staring at the front of the Innumerable Dead Walnut Grove Residents Memorial School, Church, and Typhus Hospital, with its lovely flag flying out front. The title card reads "Whisper Country." And not, as the DVD box says, "Whisper County." (Way to go, high-end DVD producers.) Come to think of it, I'm not sure I know why this episode is named "Whisper Country" at all, unless the idea is that the entire episode whispers, "Bad, bad... ." A wagon rumbles across the foreground in a picturesque fashion, then a crop of children comes running out of the school. As children generally do in this town, they are running very quickly, as if they know their life expectancy is teeny, and at any time, one could be attacked by rabid bats, die, be mourned, and have their parents taught how to move on, all in one episode. At the front of the pack of children is Mary "Middle Distance" Ingalls, who is not yet staring into the middle distance (she will be staring into the middle distance by the end of the season, though). She's dashing down the dirty road, and it turns out that the picturesque wagon contained Ma and Pa Ingalls (I'm very unobservant), because now, Mary is catching up with them. "Ma! Pa!" she is yelling. While she's still running toward the wagon, she hollers that she has "a job! A teaching job!" You can consider that little redundancy an example of the way the show constantly throws in those "really I am" and "but Pa!" word clusters that don't mean anything.

We cut rather abruptly to the Ingalls Fireside Contemplation Den And Nutritious Stewhouse, where Reverend Alden is sitting at the table, explaining that Eva "I Say 'School,' You Say 'Marm,' 'School!' 'Marm!' 'School!' 'Marm!'" Beadle has named Mary the most qualified student for an available teaching position. IN HELL. A shy Mary sits at the table with Ma while Pa prattles around tending the fire and trimming the hair on his chest into little topiaries. Look, a giraffe! Mary looks, to be honest, like she's hot for Reverend Alden, which is just another reason why Melissa Sue Anderson hopefully learned typing or plumbing or some other marketable skill along the way. I don't think "okay, now throw your best come-hither to the reverend" can possibly have been the acting direction she was given. Reverend Alden explains that the school is Willow Prairie's first, and that Mary will make fifteen dollars a month. I don't know how long this job is supposed to last, but I hope she doesn't spend all her money on books or visual art. You know, all things considered.

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