MONDO EXTRAS

Spring Break Bug Attack

by LTG May 4, 2005
Locusts

Xena and the rest of the Scooby gang stand around outside the Mystery Machine. They're looking up at the sky, where there is an enormous cloud of locusts floating by. After a few seconds, Xena tells them to get back in the van so they can track the locusts.

Back at the Axelrod Manse, Peter and Skinny are Indian wrestling by the side of the road. (I'm sure there's some less offensive name for what they're doing, but I'll be damned if I know what it is.) And it really, really would not be that hard for Peter to break Skinny right in two. I'm kind of rooting for something like that to happen. Peter thinks that the fact that his toothpick of a daughter can't outwrestle him is a sign that maybe he doesn't need to go to the gym. The bus pulls up, and Peter hands Skinny her bookbag and gives her a kiss before she gets on the bus. The bus driver greets him, calling him "Dr. Axelrod," and Peter returns the greeting, calling the bus driver "Ralphie." And I don't care what grade the kids are in, any public school bus driver who lets the kids know that his name is "Ralphie" is asking for a world of mockery. As the bus doors close, Peter yells out to Skinny, "Don't be a fool. Stay in school." I think that's John Heard's coded message to the actor playing Skinny.

Peter gets in his car to drive to the gym, and within a couple of minutes he's caught up to the bus. Skinny is standing at the back of the bus, waving to her father through the emergency exit. Which, besides being ripped off from some far superior movie (or so I'm told), makes her look even more developmentally disabled. And shouldn't Ralphie be yelling at her to sit her ass down? The bus finally turns, and Peter loses sight of it.

On the bus, Skinny takes her seat. Bizarrely enough, the other kids do not mock her for being such a retard. Ralphie drives the bus, the wheels of which go round and round.

In his car, Peter sniffs the air a few times. Can he smell the locusts? Did he use his own DNA in creating them? What is up with that? Before long, he hears the buzzing, and rolls down the window so that he can stick his head out to look around. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and starts walking through a field, trying to see where the buzzing sound is coming from. AAAAUGH! Bugs! The locusts start flying out of the grass, right at Peter. (I think I hear some of them yelling "papa" in their little bug voices.) After the swarm (much smaller than the one on the west coast) moves past him, he runs to his car. (The car, by the way, is covered with bug juice. And I don't mean Kool-Aid.) Peter turns the car around and starts driving…somewhere.

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Spring Break Bug Attack

by LTG May 4, 2005
Locusts

Xena and the rest of the Scooby gang stand around outside the Mystery Machine. They're looking up at the sky, where there is an enormous cloud of locusts floating by. After a few seconds, Xena tells them to get back in the van so they can track the locusts.

Back at the Axelrod Manse, Peter and Skinny are Indian wrestling by the side of the road. (I'm sure there's some less offensive name for what they're doing, but I'll be damned if I know what it is.) And it really, really would not be that hard for Peter to break Skinny right in two. I'm kind of rooting for something like that to happen. Peter thinks that the fact that his toothpick of a daughter can't outwrestle him is a sign that maybe he doesn't need to go to the gym. The bus pulls up, and Peter hands Skinny her bookbag and gives her a kiss before she gets on the bus. The bus driver greets him, calling him "Dr. Axelrod," and Peter returns the greeting, calling the bus driver "Ralphie." And I don't care what grade the kids are in, any public school bus driver who lets the kids know that his name is "Ralphie" is asking for a world of mockery. As the bus doors close, Peter yells out to Skinny, "Don't be a fool. Stay in school." I think that's John Heard's coded message to the actor playing Skinny.

Peter gets in his car to drive to the gym, and within a couple of minutes he's caught up to the bus. Skinny is standing at the back of the bus, waving to her father through the emergency exit. Which, besides being ripped off from some far superior movie (or so I'm told), makes her look even more developmentally disabled. And shouldn't Ralphie be yelling at her to sit her ass down? The bus finally turns, and Peter loses sight of it.

On the bus, Skinny takes her seat. Bizarrely enough, the other kids do not mock her for being such a retard. Ralphie drives the bus, the wheels of which go round and round.

In his car, Peter sniffs the air a few times. Can he smell the locusts? Did he use his own DNA in creating them? What is up with that? Before long, he hears the buzzing, and rolls down the window so that he can stick his head out to look around. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and starts walking through a field, trying to see where the buzzing sound is coming from. AAAAUGH! Bugs! The locusts start flying out of the grass, right at Peter. (I think I hear some of them yelling "papa" in their little bug voices.) After the swarm (much smaller than the one on the west coast) moves past him, he runs to his car. (The car, by the way, is covered with bug juice. And I don't mean Kool-Aid.) Peter turns the car around and starts driving…somewhere.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25Next

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Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

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